The Sexual Attitude Reassessment (SAR) is a professional development opportunity for providers in areas such as healthcare, mental health, education, sexuality, and social work. These will be key for those looking to become sex therapists! SARs are process-oriented seminars that challenge attendees to evaluate their own internal beliefs, values, and attitudes towards sexuality topics. The American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists (AASECT), further explains that “the goal of the 21st Century SAR is to develop within sexuality professionals a sexological worldview that is appropriately self-aware, informed and flexible enough to encourage practice excellence. The 21st Century SAR accomplishes this through the conscious use of transformational learning experiences, self-reflective process, small group experience, and courageous conversations” (AASECT, 2006).
Sex Positive Parenting Conference Takeaways
If you weren’t able to attend our May sex-positive parenting conference, don’t fret. We at SHA will share *some* of the key takeaways from the event with you! The main speaker at the conference was one of our favorite sexperts- Jasmine Johnson AKA Jet Setting Jasmine. For those who aren’t yet familiar with Jasmine’s work in the sex industry, she is co-owner of award-winning Royal Fetish Films, a licensed psychotherapist with a strong emphasis on intimacy post-injury or illness, and an educator in sex-positive parenting among other amazing things. Jasmine works alongside her partner King Noire, with whom she also parents her children. Jet Setting Jasmine and King Noire are the definition of a dynamic duo- they have managed to create a relationship rooted in both family and work that survives on pure trust. Together, Jet Setting Jasmine and King Noire create authentic pornography and incorporate that same sex-positive mindset into their parenting. The conference featured King Noire as a guest presenter, as well as his daughter with Jasmine, Mani, as well as many other guests such as Jessica Nater. Jasmine offered those who attended a look into her life as a performer, business owner, mother, and partner throughout the conference. She covered a lot of topics, ranging from how to parent children as a porn performer and producer, as well as…
V for Vagina: The Vagina Museum
In Iceland, of all places, there is a penis museum. Established in 1997, the Icelandic Phallological Museum boasts having 280 phallus specimens from 93 species of animals. The museum is truly the A-Z on all things penis-related. Florence Schechter wasn’t impressed. She was even more frustrated when she learned there was no vagina* equivalent. Taking matters into her own hands, 20 years later, Schechter founded the Vagina Museum with a view of becoming the world’s first bricks and mortar museum dedicated to gynecological anatomy. From 2017 to 2018, the museum was in pop-up form, traveling around England, but Schechter’s dream came true: In 2019 they opened their first location in Camden Market.
Books On Sexuality To Read After Nagoski’s Come As You Are
It’s safe to say that Emily Nagoski’s book, Come As You Are: The Surprising New Science that Will Transform your Sex Life, is a game-changer for the sexuality literary lay-people. Every page is filled with groundbreaking science and research proving that how your feel about your parts is the key to a confident and joyful sex life. Nagoski takes your hand and guides you through this research, breaking down the scientific terms for us laypeople, and ultimately brings the reader into a new, sexually freeing understanding. Since there’s a chance you already have this book proudly displayed on your shelf, here is a list of books that would also look well on your shelf.
All Aboard! Check Out the Boobs Cruise
Our next getaway is certainly overdue. When was the last time any of us were on a plane? If Cancun, Mexico is a destination you’re considering, might I suggest looking into the Boobs Cruise? Not to be confused with Booze Cruise, which is still fun but decidedly less fun than this, the Boobs Cruise is a topless/nude catamaran day trip. It is operated by CancunCare.com and is located at the Temptations Cancun Resort—though you do not have to be a guest at the resort to join in the fun!
Yes, No, Maybe Checklists – Not Just a Game!
A client comes to you—they’re looking to add some spice to their sex life. Where do they start? As a sexuality professional, what do you recommend? A fantastic way to start the conversation is by having them complete a “yes, no, maybe” checklist!
In essence, the yes, no, maybe checklist is a document that contains a list of sexual activities, positions, products, kinks, fetishes, etc. and an area to mark a response of “yes,” “no,” or “maybe” to indicate your level of interest in said item. All partners in the relationship should complete the checklist separately then come together to discuss their responses.
Feminist Porn
Feminism is the “belief in, and advocacy of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes expressed especially through organized activity on behalf of women's rights and interests” (Merriam-Webster). Feminism and pornography have a complicated relationship, as a lot of mainstream porn promotes unrealistic and often heteronormative ideologies. Mainstream porn adheres to the harmful neoliberal mindset that performers, specifically cis-gendered women, are not people but rather bodies that should fit into a stereotyped mold of perfection to be marketed unjustly. Consequently, many feminists use this reasoning to justify their anti-pornography views. Anti-porn feminists have argued that “(1) harm is endemic to the production of pornography; (2) its existence increases the rates of rape and other violence against women and (3) that it supports and promotes gender inequality (economic, status or otherwise), contributing to women’s subordination” (tandfonline.com). In other words, the consumption of pornography promotes rape culture and disrespect toward cis-gendered women. More than this, many anti-pornography feminists feel that mainstream porn sets unrealistic standards.
The GENDERbread Person
Gender identity, expression, physical sex, sexuality, and romanticism—all these facets of our identity exist on a scale. Throughout our lives, most of us will encounter slight shifts in some or all of these categories as we develop emotionally, physically, and psychologically, and as we become more intimate and comfortable with ourselves. Recognizing the similarities and differences in each of these aspects of our lives helps us better understand ourselves, others, and the beautifully diverse world surrounding us. As sexuality professionals, this knowledge also helps us connect with and educate our clients who might be questioning their sexuality or gender.
Where to Find Ethical Porn
If you read our recent article on Ethical pornography, “What is Ethical Porn and What Can We Learn from it?” you’re probably wondering where to find this type of pornography! I mentioned in the article that ethical pornography can be hard to spot, as “porn is vulnerable to being "harmful, exploitive and misused.” (Dr. David Ley) In this sense, it can be difficult to find pornography that adheres to ethical production protocols and advocates for ethical consumption methods. If you’re curious about where to find ethical porn, we at SHA are here to help. Below we’ve compiled a short guide to ethical pornography and will shine a spotlight on some great ethical porn creators!
Our Mammalian Desire for Play
Again and again, Midori reminded us that BDSM is fundamentally about play and that play is a necessary component of being a mammal. As humans, engaging in cultural and societal norms are what’s encouraged and there’s the unspoken-ness that we are expected to grow out of this desire for play and replace it with what – the weight of responsibility and an absence of fun?
Getting to Know Jennifer Rahner, the Educator!
What would you say to new parents needing to have “The Talk” with their child?
The most important thing to remember is that it’s not just one talk - educating your children about sex is a series of conversations you have over the course of their lives. You should give young children age-appropriate information and introduce bodily autonomy and consent so they can speak up when something isn’t right. For older children and adolescents, answer their questions as they come up and prepare them for the next stages in their lives in a comfortable, natural way, as if you were discussing their chores or homework. Why is that important? They will glean how they should feel about sexuality from you, and if you’re nervous or ashamed, they will pick up on it and adopt the attitude themselves. Use cultural queues to start conversations, such as song lyrics or scenes in TV shows or movies, and ask your children if they understand what is being said/shown, and if they don’t, ask them if they’d like to understand. Give them the information they need without overwhelming them, and allow them to ask for more.
What is Ethical Porn and What Can We Learn from it?
A quick google search defines ethical porn as: “that which is made legally, respects the rights of performers, has good working conditions, shows both fantasy and real-world sex, and celebrates sexual diversity.” (abc.net.au) For the mainstream pornography viewer, ethics may not be something that comes to mind when you’re picking out masturbation material. This lack of thought is a result of the misrepresentation of sex work, coupled with the problematic ideology that unethical practices are just something that is both accepted and expected within the porn industry. Ethics should be the main priority in both the production and consumption of all pornography-sex work is work- and all people deserve to be treated as human beings at their job.
3 BIG Benefits of Getting Your Sex Therapist Certification Online with SHA
So, you want to get your sex therapist certification, but in-person classes aren’t a viable option in today’s world and it might not be right for your lifestyle or schedule in the future. If this sounds like you, we have great news! Sexual Health Alliance is currently offering sex therapist certification online.
Sluts & Scholars - The Importance of Sex Therapy & Proper Certification
Certified Sex Therapist and Sexual Health Alliance (SHA) founder Heather McPherson was a guest speaker on Nicoletta Heidegger’s podcast Sluts and Scholars. Podcast host Heidegger is a licensed marriage and family therapist and sex therapist; she chats with people from sexuality, kink, and professional spectrums about desire, pleasure, shame, and stigma around these issues. Guest McPherson begins the podcast by giving the audience a little taste of what SHA has to offer for its participants and students.
Confronting our Blind Spots: How to Work Through Bias as a Sex Therapist
When becoming a Sex Therapist, it is vital that you first look within and be honest with yourself about the potential harmful ideologies we have picked up along our lifetime. Biases arise from our experiences and the information we gather in life, which is filtered through our identity and culture. Some of our biases are known to us and some are unknown or hidden. No one is immune to society's socialization tactics, however, it is our moral obligation as sex therapists to recognize, confront, and overcome these.
Modern Sexual Issues in Education and Therapy from Dr. David Ley: Conference Takeaways
Dr. David Ley, clinical psychologist, sex therapist, and internationally recognized author, who specializes in sex-positive sex therapy and sexuality issues gave a two-day conference covering modern sexual issues in education and therapy. He began his lecture by emphasizing that we have allowed sexual shame, morality, and bias to intrude into our clinical thinking. Sexual health is not merely the absence of disease, dysfunction, and infirmity, but how you engage in sex.
20 Questions - Featuring Midori
Midori, otherwise known as the “Supernova of Kink” (well if you are asking Dan Savage). Her fascinating career has lead her to be one of the most transformative individuals in the sexuality field. So, we decided to learn more about this captivating woman with a round of “20 questions”. Her charm and wit shine through even on paper (or computer screen). Now, let’s meet Midori.
How to Decide if You Need AASECT Certification
AASECT stands for American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists. AASECT Certification allows you to garner new skills in your already established career, or aid in creating a new career in sex education, sex therapy or sexuality counseling. An AASECT Certification will increase your value as a professional and set you apart from other sexuality professionals.
Becoming a Certified Sex Therapist
David Ley
By: SHA Intern Tula Pitcher
“I love the transformative power of sexual self-acceptance.” - David Ley
Dr. David Ley is a clinical psychologist and internationally recognized expert on sexuality, pornography, and mental health. Ever since adolescence, Ley has always been intrigued by sex and sexuality. As a teenager, Ley became fascinated by science fiction characters who “accepted and embraced their sexuality without shame.” Later, he began his academic career as a philosophy major from Ole Miss. After receiving his bachelor’s, Ley went on to pursue his Master’s and Doctoral degrees in clinical psychology from the University of New Mexico. David Ley initially started working with sex offenders, where he realized there was a lot of ignorance and work that needed to be done within the field of sexuality. Ley began getting lots of referrals for his expertise - “Just because I had learned the power of not shaming,” he said. Ley now works as the Executive Director of New Mexico Solutions, an outpatient mental health and substance abuse program in Albuquerque.
Dr. Ley is best known for his controversial book, The Myth of Sex Addiction, that was inspired by the mainstream media’s reaction to his first book, Insatiable Wives. The media quickly picked up on Ley’s provoking ideas, earning him interviews with Anderson Cooper, Katie Couric, and Dr. Phil. Dr. Ley has also written Ethical Porn for Dicks, A Man’s Guide to Responsible Viewing Pleasure, that was endorsed by Pornhub.com. In addition to being featured on numerous TV shows, Ley has also been interviewed by the New York Times, Washington Post, LA Times, and Hustler and Playboy magazines.
Ley is now investigating professional misconduct among teachers, lawyers, doctors, therapists and police. He is also doing work on forensic testimony, trying to help the legal system better understand the complexity of sexuality. Additionally, he continues to provoke and redefine controversial questions of sexuality, masculinity, psychology and culture through his clinical work and collaboration with the Sexual Health Alliance.
Dr. Ley will be speaking at our conference on March 27th and 28th on Modern Sexual Issues in therapy and education. David Ley’s experience and research within the sexual field has made him an expert on the evolving issues seen in sex and relationships, which he will be focusing on during the conference. Most therapists have no training or exposure to the more contemporary issues revolving around sex and sexuality, and Ley will be reviewing a number of topics in order to break the ice on these taboo matters. Topics covered in the March conference include social media, nymphomania, sexual “pathologies,” porn, religion, and BDSM. Get to know David Ley a bit better by learning from him on how to be the most effective sexuality professional you can be - reserve your spot today!