When becoming a Sex Therapist, it is vital that you first look within and be honest with yourself about the potential harmful ideologies we have picked up along our lifetime. Therapist bias, as we define it, is a perception, attitude, emotion, belief, or idea that limits the sex therapist’s capacity to relate to their client as a whole, or that creates a tendency to marginalize aspects of that person’s experience. Biases arise from our experiences and the information we gather in life, which is filtered through our identity and culture. Some of our biases are known to us and some are unknown or hidden. No one is immune to society's socialization tactics, however, it is our moral obligation as sex therapists to recognize, confront, and overcome these biases.
When becoming a sex therapist, checking your own biases and confronting the ingrained harmful ideologies, stereotypes, and implicit biases towards those who are different from us can significantly help us enhance our ability to understand the diverse experiences that clients bring. Therapists' attitudes and biases directly affect the process of psychotherapy; they can be sensed by the client through responses and behavior as well as cognition the therapist puts off. When personal biases are present it can be extremely difficult to provide the appropriate diagnosis, plan intervention, and or strategies to improve their situation. If the client is seeking asylum from the outside world’s judgment and stigmas, only to come to a therapist with harmful biases, it can trigger internalized oppression and further damage the sense of self the client has. Biases to look out for include: racism, microaggressions, sexism, homophobia, fatphobia, prejudices, sexual biases, negativity bias, and self-serving bias. Tolerance for ambiguity or the ease with which an individual copes with situations in which a great deal is unknown is an important skill to cultivate as a sex therapist.
While most psychologists’ training provides them a solid foundation for treating sexual difficulties, sex-specific training, or sex therapist certification, is extremely valuable, especially because its goal is for psychologists to confront their own beliefs, biases, and discomfort around sex. Seeking out and attending workshops and seminars on unconscious bias or training courses on implicit biases can be a great start on confronting these harmful ideologies we have internalized. Sex therapist certification workshops and classes help provide sex therapists with appropriate training and gaining confidence in their sex therapy skills. The next step would be to take the IAT, the Implicit Association Test, which aims to point out potential attitudes and beliefs you may hold about people based on certain characteristics like age or skin tone. It is important to note that this test has not had the greatest re-test or validity, but it can be an indicator for some areas you need improvement on. Sensitivity of semantics should be an important topic at these kinds of training, along with the importance of inclusivity when becoming a Sex Therapist.
You can even reach out to Poly and Kink support groups in your area and ask them to sit in a meeting or to simply ask questions about their community to best serve their community in your sex therapy work. Cultural differences, including culture shock, should also be considered when becoming a sex therapist. Every culture has different ways of communicating (both verbally and non-verbally), addressing and solving problems, and different family dynamics that may affect the way they handle and receive help.
Creating a culturagram can be a helpful tool to understand the client’s family context; this is a visual tool that helps clinicians examine factors such as language spoken at home, the impact of trauma and crisis events, and influence of clients values regarding family, work, or education. Addressing biases as Sex Therapists is an ongoing process that has no end, due to everyone having biases and the vast ways individuals differ within cultures and between cultures. Culturagrams can be modified to operate as a visual tool in making sense and tracking of polygamy and open relationship dynamics your client has along with cultural differences that arise. There’s also a growing awareness that sexual- and gender minority people who experience sexual dysfunction may have complicating factors, i.e. an added layer of discrimination and marginalization, that need to be addressed in treatment. This intersectionality adds to the importance of addressing our own biases when becoming a sex therapist who must capable of treating all kinds of people. It is important to note that being a part of a marginalized group does not call for immunity to potentially harmful biases. In our experience and anecdotal research, we find that biases are in all of us and affect us all. Again, no one is immune to bias, and the presence of them should not scare you or cause shame. Every sex therapist should check their biases at the door.
Join Sexual Health Alliance at our next Sexual Attitude Reassessment (SAR) Oct. 20th-24th in Cancun Mexico. A real-life opportunity for educators, counselors, therapists, and coaches to get back in touch with their beliefs and attitudes toward various aspects of human sexuality. Participants will be exposed to the material in different formats (media, experiential exercises, reading, group discussions, role-plays, etc.) and will be given a safe and supportive environment to discuss their reflections. There will be self-reflection time as well as guided small group discussions.
A SAR, if provided in an authentic, skillful and holistic way, is not just another training that you attend, it will be a life-changing experience. Many of the SAR participants will remain friends and supportive colleagues for life through this shared journey.