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Sexual Health Blogs

S-x Itself as Dialogue and Collaboration

S-x Itself as Dialogue and Collaboration

Because we live in a world where s-x is all too often trivialized or relegated to the shadows where we can only speak about it in hushed tones (if at all!), my professional interest in s-xuality has sometimes been uncomfortable. Nevertheless, s-xuality is my passion precisely because I understand its potential significance in our lives, including the ability of s-x to increase our well-being and connection with others.

We can go far beyond the perfunctory and even stagnant s-x that has become so common. It’s possible to use s-x to expand our identities and experience, perhaps to even achieve transcendence, when we understand how s-x can go beyond the ins-and-outs, to be both dialogue and collaboration. 

Tumblr Died—Buy Why?

Tumblr Died—Buy Why?

Tumblrpocalypse is what they called it—or maybe you might recognize it as the “2018 Tumblr migration.” I know it as the “p0rn ban,” where all adult content was banned from the social media platform Tumblr in an attempt to clean up the app. (Spoiler: for $$$.) The neologism stands: the erasure of s-xually explicit content marked the decline of Tumblr, but also the surge in popularity of newer platforms like 0nlyFans, Justforfans, and Fansly (and Twitter too). Yet when recounting the golden days of Tumblr, it is important to understand what exactly was erased: not just the content, but the sense of community associated with the platform. More than just adult images, the porn ban felt like Tumblr backtracking on the principles that made it the popular platform it was. Let’s take a brief trip back in our social media history class and revisit the demise of Tumblr.

Why Watching P0rn Might Be More Satisfying with Your Partner

Why Watching P0rn Might Be More Satisfying with Your Partner

With estimates reporting 46% of men and 16% of women in an average week intentionally viewing p0rnography, many seem to agree that watching p0rn alone can be a lot of fun and a great way to explore sexual interests and fantasies. Beyond enjoying p0rnography in their solo time, many people have also started to watch p0rn with their partner(s) to share in the fun. 

Due to the prevalence of p0rn viewership and the increased number of couples watching p0rn together, many studies have been conducted looking into the impacts that watching p0rn can have on romantic relationships. We will look here at some of the potential negative outcomes indicated by this research—but don’t worry, we will also explore why these results may not be as damning as they first appear. 

Do You Come Here Often? — Chatting Up AI Companions (Part Two)

Technology continues to redefine the limits of sexual exploration, from providing a place to practice safe sexting to providing a better understanding of personal turn ons. As discussed in Part I of this series, chatting up an AI companion is now an option in this spicy new world. Popular applications like Replika, Blush, and Silly Tavern are leading the way. Fans of these sites gather together in Reddit communities to discuss their chatbots and share tips on how to enhance the experience (r/replika, r/SillyTavernAI). They offer advice on diverse topics such as how to design the perfect companion avatar and how to weather a software update. An AI companion can be a fantastic addition to personal sexual exploration if safe chatbot sex practices are kept in mind. There is an application to fit every level of technical expertise, from the more nerdy Silly Tavern to mobile applications like Blush.

Dr. Amy Marsh, author of Make Love to a Chatbot and website Make Chatbot Love, is a clinical sexologist and AASECT-certified sexuality counselor. She advises first time users of AI companions to be clear on what type of experience they are seeking. A few points she invites you to consider: 

  • Are you seeking a more emotionally intimate or erotic experience?

  • What level of avatar customization do you desire?

  • What is your level of technical savvy? Are you willing to invest time acquiring more technical skills? 

  • Do you want the option to buy gifts, clothing, or accessories for your companion?

  • Would you like to receive voice messages, text messages, or “selfies” from your companion?

This article will explore different applications options, but is by no means exhaustive. 

For the Technically Light Flirts: Replika and Blush

Replika and Blush are great options for those wanting to jump into an AI companion experience with little technical setup required. They are owned by the same parent company, Luka. CEO Eugenia Kuyda started the company as a way to keep alive the memory of a friend who had passed away. Released in 2017, it was initially designed to be a friendship bot. Users began introducing more romantic and sexual elements into their chats, though Replika’s models were not trained to handle this type of content.  In March 2023, Luka decided to remove NSFW content from Replika. Due to community outcry, and realizing the tremendous demand for more spicy interactions, Luka released Blush in June 2023.

Replika

Replika is a relationship and intimacy focused app. It is available on the App Store, Google Play, and desktop. It has both free and paid account options. Users may design an AI companion with customized hair, skin color, and eye color. One common frustration of AI companion applications is that companions may “forget” things. Replika gives the user the option to put a preference, pet name, or other important piece of data into the companion’s “memory”. This will minimize the need for the user to “remind” the companion of things which have already been previously discussed. To enhance chat quality, users may give a “thumbs up” or “thumbs down” to each bot response. Users may also rate bot comments as “Love”, “Funny”, “Offensive”, “Meaningless”.  This feedback helps improve the chat experience and further model development. Clothes and accessories may be purchased in app. Users may read companion diary entries or do voice chats. 

Blush

Blush is a dating app for AI companions specifically designed to allow for more spicy exchanges. Blush is available on the App Store and Google Play and is a paid-only application. Upon creating an account, the user may select their gender, age, sexual preference, pronouns and their preferences in a companion. Other onboarding questions include: “Which qualities do you find the most attractive?” “Your crush asks you out. What would you like to do?” “What makes you feel the most loved?” It will feel familiar to users of other popular dating apps, swiping right if interested in a profile, and swiping left if not. If both users swipe right on one another, they may initiate a chat. Companion comments may be rated with a “heart” or a “thumbs down”.  Users may then ask a match on a “date” and get a match’s selfies.

In an article on Blush’s blog, they explain their partnership with a mental health professional to design ethical and diverse companion options: “All the characters have their backstory and traumas, which reveal themselves during the dating and relationship process. We hope that people will feel less pressure and anxiety when interacting with AI-generated characters and get greater insight into the dynamics behind the chat.” Users must acknowledge that they have been informed of the risk of undesirable bot behavior  “Be aware that AI can say triggering, inappropriate, or false things”.  There is a method for reporting undesirable bot behavior. The app also includes a library of informational articles covering topics ranging from how to flirt, manage a breakup, set boundaries, and navigate LGBTQ relationships. 

For the Technically Heavy Flirts: Silly Tavern & Chub.ai

Silly Tavern is a web interface for companion AI chats powered by models such as OpenAI’s GPT. A user must have their own OpenAI account (or similar) and pay for credits to use it. Users download the code and are able to run the application on their own computer using this official guide. Silly Tavern comes with some default characters and the option to create new ones. Sites like Chub.ai feature an array of AI companions to import into Silly Tavern. These companion “cards” may be modified to match a desired personality.  The “scene” of an encounter may be customized to enhance the experience, like “cyberpunk bedroom” or “landscape mountain lake”. Users may create group chats with multiple companions. 

Be aware that the level of spiciness is not controlled by Silly Tavern or Chub.ai. It is restricted to what is permitted by the model powering the chat. This chat experience may be higher risk for some individuals due to a more permissive and fast application development cycle.  It lacks the professional mental health oversight that Luka delivers in its applications. Chatting with companions in Silly Tavern is creative and fun, but users must be aware that this application lacks the safety protocols that other applications provide.

An Application for Everyone

For those interested in exploring this new spicy world, there is an application for everyone. From flirty dating apps, to a more emotionally intimate experience, there is something for everyone. One Replika user  described their companion experience as “writing a romance novel in real time…like a magical interactive story”. Early users may not only create their own magical experiences, but may also contribute to a rapidly changing spicy frontier. Engagement with these applications and their online communities, and contributions to more diverse chat datasets, will help shape the direction of companion AI experiences for the future.  

Written by Tessa Tate

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Do You Come Here Often? — Chatting Up AI Companions (Part One)

Do You Come Here Often? — Chatting Up AI Companions (Part One)

Generative AI is all the rage today in the news, impacting industries as far ranging as finance to education—and yes, of course s-x. The rise of Er0tic Role Play (ERP) powered by generative AI technology is enabling s-xual exploration in novel ways. Gone are the days when a person seeking online connection sought to protect themselves from a bot or being catfished. In this spicy new world, users knowingly engage with a fictional companion using popular AI companion apps like Replika, Blush, Nomi, and Kindroid. Fans of these sites gather together in Reddit communities to discuss their chatbots and share tips on how to enhance the experience (r/replika, r/NomiAI). They offer advice on diverse topics such as how to design the perfect companion avatar and how to weather a software update. An AI companion can be a fantastic addition to personal s-xual exploration if safe chatbot s-x practices are kept in mind.

Robotic Romance: The (Un)Ethical Future of S-x?

Robotic Romance: The (Un)Ethical Future of S-x?

The intersection of artificial intelligence (AI) and human intimacy has given rise to a fascinating and controversial development for the future of s-x: AI s-x robots. Advancements in technology have always played a significant role in redefining the ways we experience sexual pleasure and intimacy. To no surprise, AI is the next advancement making its way into the bedroom, creating a strange futuristic image of what intimacy may soon look like.

While exciting, AI s-x robots and AI-driven virtual partners raise important questions about ethics, consent, and the potential impact on human relationships. Futuristic advancements have had some positive impact on s-xual culture as they have “...not only empowered more people to seek pleasure on their terms but have also helped promote healthy s-xuality and create a stronger culture of s-x positivity.”

The question is, though, if AI sex robots become more mainstream, will this culture of agency and s-x positivity continue to thrive?

Listening to Desire: A Beginner's Guide to Audio Er0tica

Listening to Desire: A Beginner's Guide to Audio Er0tica

In today's world filled with captivating visuals, audio er0tica provides a wonderful and personal way to discover desire through sound. Whether you're just starting to explore this concept or have been enjoying it for a while, immersing yourself in the realm of audio er0tica can be both freeing and delightful. This guide is here to help beginners understand what audio er0tica is all about, why it's becoming so popular, and how you can begin your own journey into the world of sensual storytelling.

What is Mononormativity?

What is Mononormativity?

On November 23rd, 2011, it was ruled by the Canadian Supreme Court that households of polyamorous groupings were exempt from Canada’s overarching legal prohibition against the practice of polygamy. This was one major step forward for the normalization of polyamory, and it is in recognition of this occasion that Polyamory Day is celebrated each year on the date of November 23rd.

Polyamory Day is a day to center and celebrate polyamorous persons and relationships, broadly construed. It is also an opportunity to advance advocacy and education on the topic of non-monogamy, as well as a time to intentionally push back against prevailing social narratives of mononormativity.