In the latest trend of sex-themed media, interior designer Melanie Rose goes behind the scenes in couples’ homes to help them create the sex room of their dreams in How to Build a Sex Room. This Netflix show, which was first released in July 2022, has become increasingly popular with viewers from all backgrounds; combining traditional reality design television with the more “taboo” world of sex and kink, the show has managed to engage different demographics and bring the subject matter to the forefront in an unassuming manner. In some ways, this show builds off of the foundation of sexual fantasy that popular media like the Fifty Shades of Grey franchise created and orients itself in the context of everyday life. The appeal of the show is that it centers on real couples, who explore sex and kink in an accessible way and are also not afraid to show this off in the media.

The designer, Melanie Rose, is a British woman known as the “Mary Poppins of Pleasure” (coolest nickname ever) who has successfully built a career in media and design over the past twenty years. While Rose is clearly dedicated to her craft and a master in her field, the true skillset she brings to the show is her clean and open communication with the couples on the show. She begins each session by seeing the potential space for renovation and then discussing with the contestants their current sexual desires and the areas which they may be willing to explore. She comes prepared with a bag of sex toys and bondage tools, including handcuffs, floggers, and anal plugs. Then, based off of the conversations about desire and kink, Rose designs and creates the perfect room for the couple with the help of her contractor, Mike.

It’s a tale as old as time: You’re talking to someone whose personality can only be described as the equivalent to boiled (unseasoned) potatoes. There is nothing remotely interesting about them, but you still find yourself fascinated with them, putting yourself through dull conversations about cryptocurrency or the new ‘Alpha Male Podcast’ they’re listening to. You take a moment to reflect on why you’re putting yourself through these boring conversations, and why on earth you’re still attracted to them—your conclusion? You don’t actually like him, he’s just tall. So why is this such a universal phenomenon? This article aims to uncover why we find ourselves more attracted to taller people, and also remind you that being tall is not a personality trait.

A 2015 study found that “human height is positively related to interpersonal dominance in dyadic interactions,” otherwise said, height and stature are seen to be synonymous with status and power. In terms of self-perception, it has been found that taller individuals, particularly taller men, have far higher levels of self-esteem in comparison to shorter individuals. Furthermore, not only are taller individuals perceived to be more threatening during a physical contest, but they are perceived to be “more competent, authoritative, intelligent, dominant, and having better leadership qualities.” There seems to be no negative associations with tall individuals. Even in naturalistic settings, like moving through a crowded street, the study found that “taller individuals were more likely to take precedence.”

At the beginning of their book “Calling Bullshit,” University of Washington Professors Carl Bergstrom and Jevin West offer an explanation for the prevalence of bullshit: “everyone […] is trying to sell you something.” In the current attention economy—where websites are essentially paid by the amount of engagement—concern for science and health has been exchanged for the art of fabrication, sensationalism, and marketing. This creates a fast-moving, often careless, digital culture that feeds on people’s emotional connection to the topics they care about. We also know that this relationship is circular, as social media platforms offer advertisers the opportunity to target consumers with sometimes-guised messages catering to their interests. Thus, our interests both shape and are being shaped by our everyday online experience through carefully curated algorithms. These veiled brand advertisements employ cognitive biases and logical fallacies in their attempt to impersonate an expert on any given subject.

An example of a brand posing as a health expert is actress Gwyneth Paltrow’s lifestyle brand “Goop.” Goop began in 2008 as a newsletter and has since expanded to a website, online store, books, and brick-and-mortar storefronts. In 2018, Goop lost a lawsuit after their product description of their “vaginal egg” product was deemed misleading in its unscientific claims. In early 2020, Paltrow also produced a Netflix series based on her blog posts called “Goop Lab” where her Goop employees try different lifestyle changes in hopes of finding holistic cures for physical and mental illnesses. Then, she followed this series up with another almost instant cult classic, “Sex, Love & Goop” examining sexual dysfunction in couples and the potential healing power of multiple therapeutic types with a nonchalant tone that doesn’t do the complex subject the justice it deserves. This is at the heart of what makes Goop different (and arguably more dangerous) from other advertisers—often, what the company advertises are health-based recommendations, which have not been fact-checked or medically cleared by any substantial source.

The Intrauterine Device, better known as an IUD, is one of the most effective birth control methods for people with uteruses. There are multiple types of IUDs, some hormonal and non-hormonal, but all are small plastic "T" shaped devices placed in the uterine cavity and cervix which is a simple procedure, yes, but one with insurmountable evidence of pain and even PTSD from some problematic insertion practices. The hormonal IUDs create more condensed mucus around the cervix, which traps and kills sperm. In addition, the hormones can stop ovulation altogether, meaning no eggs are leaving the ovaries, thus making pregnancy impossible - if there's no egg, there can be no fertilization. The non-hormonal IUD works more straightforwardly: sperm does not like copper. Non-hormonal IUDs are still made with plastic then wrapped with a small copper wire which protects the cervix from sperm. What are the benefits? How long does it last? How effective is it?

With the recent overturning of decades of precedent on privacy set by Roe v. Wade via the recent Dobbs v. Jackson Women’s Health Organization decision weighing heavy on the hearts of the nation, bodily autonomy is at a critical juncture that will determine how bodies experience pleasure for years to come. After all, what is pleasure without freedom? This seems grim but it is also not the first time certain bodies have been denied some kind of freedom. In order to be able to own our sexuality amid chaos, we need to recognize each other’s struggles, trace the historical elitism of pleasure, and stand together to say “never again.” So, let us explore which bodies are “allowed” to have private, sexual pleasure as determined by the public sphere.

We begin at the very conception of binary thinking (public versus private, woman versus man, etc.): Platonian society circa 428-347 B.C. Plato represents one of the first political commentators to engage in conversation revolving around women’s positionality in society. However, he chooses to have this conversation on the grounds of what is good for the community, and not for the equality of the genders. He understands that in order for society to continue, women are the necessary backbones in the home (the private sphere), through their birthing and raising of children, cleaning, cooking, etc.; yet he refuses to allow them the satisfaction of freedom in the public sphere.

During a pre-bedtime scroll through TikTok I was coming across multiple videos of people explaining that when their nipples are touched, either by themselves or others, they feel a great sense of sadness, loss, and other varying negative emotions. One TikTok user compared the sensation to “guilt and almost something like homesickness.” If you’ve read my other nipple article, you’ll know I’m a big fan of nipple play. Whilst I was aware that some people simply find no joy in nipple stimulation, I was not aware that for others, the sensation of touching their own nipples brought such negative feelings, nor was I aware that Sad Nipple Syndrome existed at all. Hence this article aims to uncover the reason and science behind it, to enlighten both me and anyone else curious to expand their nipple knowledge.

Whilst there have been articles on the connection between sadness and nipple stimulation in the past, it has only been in the context of lactation and breastfeeding. Dysphoric Milk Ejection Reflex (D-MER) is defined as an “abrupt emotional drop that occurs in some women just before milk release and continues for not more than a few minutes.” For D-MER, direct nipple stimulation was not needed for the onset of negative emotions, instead, it could be triggered by anything that caused a milk release. D-MER symptoms further seem to form a spectrum of distinct and different emotions—depression, anxiety, and anger—the intensity of this varies from each person. Its lack of research and discourse has meant that it’s still greatly misunderstood, with the primary belief being that it is influenced (within minutes or hours) by circumstances that influence dopamine levels.

Talking to children about sex–and everything that entails–is one of the most controversial topics in the field of sexual education. When, where, how, and how often are questions that come to mind for parents, guardians, and educators. This topic has grown in complexity with the rise of the Internet and the increased accessibility of popular media. Film, television, social media, and more are filled with suggestive imagery and text that can spark questions in children at any age, prompting education from the adults in their lives. The information-sharing process can be complicated, but sex educators around the world have developed incredible works to aid this process, including some of the children’s books presented in this article.

For a humorous and informative background into the topic of sex education for children, I recommend watching this YouTube video featuring Sexual Health Alliance’s own Dr. Chris Donaghue. In this clip, Dr. Donaghue teaches parents Kristen Bell and Andy Lassner how to talk to children about sex, overcoming the awkwardness they may feel around the topic. An important takeaway from the video comes from Dr. Donaghue, who says, “The way we as adults talk about sex and body parts, and the language that we use is either going to make our children feel very confident or anxious and insecure.” Teaching without discomfort, shame, or negativity is a key component of inclusive and accessible sex education, especially for this sponge-like demographic who are known to absorb much more than adults give them credit for.

The basis of ethical perspectives including utilitarianism, universal human rights, contractualism, and communitarianism outline not only moral theories but also moral dilemmas. However, in practice, these dilemmas go further than pure theory, having real-world impacts on communities. For example, within the sphere of public health, stigma resulting from health issues or created in order to discourage certain lifestyles cause certain communities to be ostracized and left without proper health resources. We see this not only in the United States’ cultural bias against those with sexually transmitted infections but also with non-sexually transmitted infections caused by various viruses. Rather than further fuel these hateful flames, which do nothing to solve the underlying issues and only make it more challenging for oppressed populations, by approaching these problems through a social justice lens, distributive and recognitional justice interpretations support an argument against creating and reinforcing stigma.

Erika Blacksher, affiliate associate professor in the Department of Bioethics and Humanities at the University of Washington and fourth John B. Francis Chair in Bioethics, asserts that the goals of public health require public health to counteract existing stigma and not use stigmatized measures in its public approach. Elements of stigma might include individuals with socioeconomic and political power identifying and labeling a difference, linking this difference and those labeled as such with negative stereotypes, creating an “us” versus “them” framework, and discriminating against “them” in order to cause a loss of “their” socioeconomic or political status. This ensures the familiar power structures are kept intact in alignment with the patriarchal hierarchy, while health disparities widen between the upper and lower classes. However, when applied to public health, this stigma can have life-threatening consequences. In fact, from a communitarian theorist’s view, Blacksher explains stigma can drive health disparities by putting the blame on individuals or certain communities, as well as lowering the self-worth of those with stigmatized health issues.

I can’t tell you how many times this happened to me during my undergraduate experience: I’d be at a party, hanging out with my friends, and a conversation would start between a fraternity member and me. I tend to be quite the open book, especially after a drink or two. So, eventually, it would “come out” that I’m bisexual. At this point, it was always one of two responses: “That’s hot. That means we can have a threesome, right?” or “Oh, so like you just make out with other girls at parties?” This is not only not what it means to be a bisexual woman, it promotes harmful stereotypes that have real-life negative effects on the community. Comments like these simultaneously serve to take away a person’s autonomy to express genuine interest in the people they are actually interested in, limit the ability to desire only one partner, and undermine bisexuality as a valid sexual orientation in general.

Now, me being me, I got into a habit of pushing back on these comments by teasing these alpha males a bit. I’d respond with something like, “well, actually, your friend’s pretty cute, would you wanna have a threesome with him and me?” A look of disgust would immediately spread across their faces. Of course, they would never hook up with another man! Isn’t the whole point of bisexual women so that a man can sleep with two or more women at once without it becoming like a whole thing?! No. In fact, nothing about being a bisexual woman is meant exclusively for the entertainment or pleasure of a heterosexual man. I know that may come as a shock to many men out there, so let’s dig a little deeper into the false assumptions about bisexual women, what this results in, and why these notions are harmful to society as a whole.

Recently on TikTok, a jarring trend has emerged called “vabbing” which Rolling Stone refers to as a “portmanteau of ‘vagina’ and ‘dabbing.’” In this trend, those with vulvas will gather up their vaginal secretions to rub behind their ears in hopes that the pheromones it contains will attract potential suitors. The idea of using pheromones to increase attraction is common; there are often oils and perfumes sold with the intention to enhance your natural pheromones, and there are studies behind the effectiveness of pheromone-based attraction in many species. However, without evidence to support the proposed benefits of vabbing, it has quickly become just a humorous trend and point of discussion on the Internet. But the questions remain: is there any validity to this trend, and where did it come from?

One of the first reported mentions of vabbing in recent years comes from the book The Game of Desire by Shannon Boodram, in which she speaks to her personal success using her vaginal fluids to attract others. ABC reports that podcast the Secret Keepers Club, hosted by Carly Aquilino and Emma Willmann, mentions this phenomenon too, speaking to a trend they sparked within their friend group of using “coochie juice as perfume.” The trend spread like wildfire through the Internet, particularly on TikTok, as users began to share their own testimonies with the practice, including strangers complimenting their perfume or flirting with them in public. This anecdotal evidence was reason enough for hundreds of users to give it a shot, coupled with the unique feature of no downsides to the practice.

When beginning your journey in the sexual health industry, either as a professional or patient, it can be difficult to distinguish the difference between a Sex Therapist, a Sex Coach, and a Sex Counseling. While all three tend to fall under the same umbrella, each position has unique qualifications and specializations. Sex Therapist: A sex therapist is mental health professional licensed and certified through the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists (AASECT). Their psychotherapy education allows them to assist in short-term and long-term sexual issues. Clients may seek a sex therapist for issues such as vaginismus, sexual trauma, trouble orgasming, and more. Sex therapists work to define sexual problems by providing comprehensive care and resolutions through in-depth sessions and homework.

Time and time again displays of niceness and friendliness is being perceived as some form of sexual interest. Whilst for many women, showing a smile and being friendly is what a decent person does, men often misinterpret this signal as flirting or a sign they are interested sexually. This can then result in an uncomfortable situation, where more often than not the female counterpart still has to remain friendly and polite to prevent the situation from escalating. Whilst this article is by no means an attempt to generalize, it does aim to explain why men can perceive friendliness as flirting and the social psychology behind it.

It’s a heartbreaking experience when innocent politeness or conversation becomes mistaken for sexual desire, and the moment we realise this has happened, we wish we never engaged in the conversation in the first place. A 2017 study on the dopaminergic reward system and gender differences in social preferences reveals that women tend to display more “prosocial behavior” in comparison to men due to the dopaminergic activity in women’s brains. In more simple terms, this means that women display higher levels of warmth in their interactions in comparison to men. T

One of the main ways democratic ideals are furthered is through social justice movements, and social media networking sites have exponentially impacted the progress and reach of these social movements. While many large social media platforms have been under fire recently for their algorithms’ negative impact on democratic values, in taking a more optimistic case-by-case approach to the digital choice architecture, we can examine Facebook’s influence on the continuing success of the 2017 Women’s March and Twitter’s influence on the lasting impacts of legalized gay marriage (#LoveIsLove). Though it may seem counterintuitive at the time, social media really can be and has been used for positive change and justice movements.

Policy-based nudges are used to “improve people’s decisions by changing how options are presented to them.” Ideally, this should be utilized in a transparent, non-imposing, cost-effective, evidence-driven, nonpartisan, non-paternalist, and democratically-controlled way. Within the choice architectural frameworks that are inherently built into everyday life, there is actually no neutral way to present individuals with options. The classic example of this is to imagine yourself strolling the cereal aisle of a supermarket. The supermarket must organize their inventory on shelves, as this is customary. But here lies the inherent choice architectural framework: whatever is closest to customers’ eyeline will be most likely to be bought. The consumer still has the choice to reach for something on the top shelf, but they are more likely to miss this option or forego it to save time and effort. In this way, unintentional choice architecture can actually be the more manipulative option because it is often done in the dark or utilized by the private sphere, which does not consider the public interest.

What is consensual non-monogamy? The American Psychological Association (APA) Commission on Consensual Non-Monogamy describes it as an “umbrella term” for partners that engage in consensual sexual or romantic relationships with multiple people. This includes various labels: open relationship, polygamy, swinging…etc. The CNM lifestyle resists gender, sexuality, and relationship norms by establishing that love and intimacy aren’t solely defined by long-term monogamous partnerships, as many of us were lead to believe.

CNM can enhance individuals' sexual and romantic satisfaction and increase one’s sense of self and autonomy. However, couples must establish clear, concise boundaries to maintain those benefits. People within the world of CNMs emphasize the importance of intentionality and ongoing dialogue. These conversations about boundaries, preferences, and consent are constant and essential.

Everything starts with a conversation—go to your partner with an open heart and mind, and come prepared with questions, potential concerns, and answers. Address CNM with your partner gently. Discussing open relationships is a highly vulnerable conversation requiring both partners to honestly speak about their bodies, insecurities, and goals.

Just when you thought the discussion of sex was taboo enough, I welcome you to the act of degrading during sex. A quick google search summarizes a “degradation kink” as being the “consensual practice of using derogatory names and phrases to humiliate and degrade your partner during sex.” Degradation can fall under the sadism/masochism umbrella and can often be seen in a dominant/submissive relationship, however, note that degradation can take place outside of this dynamic. On the complete opposite side of the spectrum is the act of praise during sex, as the name suggests it is based on words of affirmation, and positive reinforcement. So why do some people enjoy these? Is it possible to find pleasure in both elements? And how can you incorporate this into your sex life?

After the Supreme Court decision that overturned Roe v. Wade, those at risk for pregnancy across the United States are faced with a new problem: long-used period-tracking apps that could become a political tool that uses your data against you in court. These apps store the data of your menstrual cycle to predict and support the changes in your hormone levels, but now many fear that this stored data can be used as proof of an abortion.

The menstrual cycle is an enigma for many, and requires a deep understanding of your biological processes to track or predict changes in your cycle. This is most often important for tracking your period and the hormonal changes that affect your mood, skin, energy, and more, as well as tracking your fertility to manage conception. For some, cycle tracking is a great way to prevent contraception, while for others, cycle tracking is an important part of intentional conception. In the past few years, developers have excelled at putting cycle-tracking apps on the market that do all of these things, as well as offer information, resources, and community support to their networks.

Over the last weekend of July, SHA held a two-day virtual conference on Engaging with the Media: Building a Business and Online Presence. We heard from sex and social media experts, including world-renowned clinical psychologist and author Dr. David Ley, sex and relationship therapist and educator Dr. Chris Donaghue, couples’ counselor and sex therapist Jen Meyer, marketing expert and MŌN app founder Cale Jones, SHA founder Heather McPherson, Netflix phenome and social media influencer Alyssa Ljubicich, founder and CEO of ethical porn website afterglow Lilly Sparks, and sex therapist and sex worker Jasmine Johnson.

Additionally, Dr. Ley facilitated master panels on journalism and how to charge money for your sexpertise. The first panel featured journalists Jelena Kecmanovic, Brian Smith, Ryn Pfeuffer, and Hallie Lieberman. Then, the Monetizing Exposure panel brought back Jasmine Johnson, Lilly Sparks, and Heather McPherson with the addition of BDSM author, educator, and social media influencer Midori of PlanetMidori. Overall, the Sexceptional Summit covered media strategies and tools to flesh out your authentic sexuality brand, get your particular style of sex-positive message out there, position yourself as an expert, and create a growing community.

Just when you thought having a uterus and having your hormones change couldn’t get any worse, I present to you the multiple negative effects of stopping your birth control pill. It is no surprise that stopping any form of birth control can have drastic effects on your mind and body; your hormones have already gone through drastic changes to now begin the process of reverting back. Whatever your reason is for stopping birth control, whether that is wanting to achieve conception, or you are experiencing negative side effects—this article will go over the possible side effects of stopping birth control, and how to do so safely. When discussing birth control, I do so in the context of hormonal birth control—any contraceptive that uses synthetic hormones to prevent pregnancy (therefore excluding methods like condoms). Hormonal birth control includes the pill, IUD, arm implants, ring, patch, and injectables.

Everyone tells you that your 20s are the perfect time to discover what you enjoy sexually. This, in turn, places unnecessary pressure on you to explore, even if it may not be something you’re actually interested in, or to worry about why you aren’t actively exploring. No one ever suggests you explore nonsexual romantic relationships or explains what that could mean for you, most likely because most people don’t believe they exist. Surprise! They do. It’s called asexuality.

What is asexuality? Angela Chen’s book Ace: What Asexuality Reveals About Desire, Society and the Meaning of Sex defines asexuality as “the lack of sexual attraction.” Asexuality is a sexual orientation, similar to someone being gay, bisexual, or pansexual. Similarly, asexuality is an inherent, unchosen part of someone’s identity. Chen’s broad definition of asexuality leaves room for individuals to identify within the spectrum rather than a box. Learning about the ace spectrum opened my eyes to a full new understanding of what love and relationships look like.

Historically, menstruation has been depicted in Hollywood as a disgusting, uncomfortable, and shameful event in a woman’s life. In films such as Carrie (1976) and My Girl (1991), the start of a period by protagonists is portrayed as a horrifying brush with death, in which both women believe they are bleeding out. In other movies such as Superbad (2007) and Blue Lagoon (1980), the female characters are subjected to shame and ridicule for their biological functions, particularly at the hands of their male counterparts.

Hollywood has come a long way in the past decade, with an increasing number of female writers and directors working to destigmatize this phenomenon and create a positive representation of periods for younger viewers. Media depictions have slowly shifted to biological processes signifying womanhood, and now to just a normal part of women's lives. In the film 20th Century Women (2016), the character Abbie played by Greta Gerwig passionately announces that everyone should be comfortable using the term “menstruation” instead of shying away from women's bodies. This scene stands out for its portrayal of periods within the film but also for its general critique of how men and male-dominated spaces further suppress womanhood through their periods.