Recently out of a relationship, I am in the stage of “self-improvement” where I’m listening to baddie playlists (check out this one on Spotify), scrolling the dating apps, and hitting the gym. While walking on the treadmill– yes, walking– I found myself wondering how I could maximize this workout phase and prepare myself for the dating scene in my future. Here, the theme of “sex workouts” was born. There just had to be lists of exercises out there that could up my game in the bedroom. Turns out, I was right, and gym rats everywhere have been sharing their tips for strengthening your bedroom game.
Exercise, as we all know, has countless benefits. Framing it through a sexual performance lens, regular (and heart-pumping!) movement can greatly increase your stamina for longer sessions, targets muscle groups that aid in sexual performance, and produce hormones that deepen your eventual sexual gratification. Working out in general, especially cardio workouts that raise your heart rate, can increase your stamina and make you equipped to extend the length of your romp in the hay. “Lasting longer” isn’t just postponing the release of your orgasm; it’s preparing your body for the physical strength of active sex. I won’t pretend that longer sex equates to better sex, but winded, exhausted sex certainly doesn’t fall at the top of the sexual performance food chain.
Certain exercises are designed to target muscle groups that can aid in your sexual abilities. Your favorite sex position uses several muscle groups, and developing these muscles will only aid in your ability to perform in these positions. For example, any “riding” positions like cowboy/girl, reverse cowboy/girl (shall we say… cowperson?) use muscles based on positioning. For those on top, the upper legs and glutes are engaged, specifically your quadriceps and hamstrings, especially if you are in control of the movement. For those underneath, active engagement would require your abdomen, lower back, and glutes to create movement and thrust upward towards your partner. The muscles these cowperson positions use are pretty intuitive (as anyone who is frequently on top can tell you) but there are so many more ways in which our muscles play into our sex lives.
Not interested in or unable to perform a traditional, full-body workout? Exercising for your sexual perfoamnce can be as simple as strengthening your fingers, wrists, and forearms for hand play, which can involve touching and engaging with a vulva/vagina, penis, or anus. There’s your basic weightlifting, but you can also stick to bodyweight exercises like pushups and planks. In fact, you don’t need to be in a gym at all to strengthen your body. Most exercises can be done at home, and I personally recommend checking out YouTube for fun workouts like this. There’s even tongue and jaw exercises designed to strengthen your oral sex game and prevent fatigue and cramping when the times comes. If you want to invest, there are exercise tools available that you can add to your regime, like weight sets and resistance bands. Queer women out there: these hand strengthening tools are our new signal.
We can’t forget about the most classic pre-sex workout for vulva owners: the Kegel. These contractions of the pelvic floor muscles are designed to strengthen your nether regions and aid in supporting your organs like the bladder! They are most commonly recommended for those experiencing incontinence, particularly for those who have recently given birth. While it can be as simple as squeezing what feels like your vagina, there are also a plethora of Kegel tools you can purchase to elevate your workout. Kegel weights like these weighted balls are great for improving the strength of your muscles, while pulsating and vibrating objects can help you isolate and locate your muscles. Some tools even double as sex toys and are designed to be used alone or with partners!
Some of these tips sound silly, but thinking about working out in this way really opened up my view of the subject. Oftentimes we lose sight of what going to the gym is for and assume that its purpose is to make us look better. In my view, it should be more about making your body feel its best, from increasing heart health and stamina to building confidence for your sex skills. With this in mind, there’s a whole new meaning to physical health and self-improvement, and it’s one that allows you to prioritize your own well-being and pleasure.
By Sydney Sullivan