As sexual health professionals, we know that sexual satisfaction and well-being are not only shaped by major life events, but are also deeply influenced by everyday interactions. Yet much of the research relies on individuals’ perceptions of their relationships, often captured through one-time surveys. While useful, this approach misses the complexity of what happens between partners in real time.
That’s where dyadic diary methods come in. Unlike traditional studies, dyadic diaries gather information from both partners. This approach allows researchers to capture the moment-to-moment dynamics of relationships, including how partners influence one another’s sexual satisfaction and overall well-being. This can be especially valuable for therapists and educators seeking to better support individuals and couples as they navigate intimacy and connection.
Recently, researchers reviewed 58 studies that used dual-partner daily diaries to look at what shapes sexual satisfaction. Systematic reviews like this are helpful because they show whether findings across studies agree or conflict. The results highlight how personal, relational, and contextual factors all interact to influence sexual well-being on a daily basis.
In this blog, we’ll walk through key takeaways from these studies helping you integrate up-to-date, evidence based insights into your practice and expand your understanding of the dynamics that contribute to healthier, more satisfying sexual relationships.
Sexual satisfaction in relationships
Before we jump into the findings, it’s important to note the limitations of the research. Most studies included heterosexual couples, with limited representation of LGBTQ+ partnerships. Only one study focused on consensually non-monogamous (CNM) relationships. Encouragingly, findings remained consistent across same-gender/sex and mixed-gender/sex couples, and no significant differences emerged between monogamous and CNM participants in terms of sexual satisfaction. Still, sexual health professionals should approach “best practices” with caution, recognizing that they often emerge from largely homogenous study populations.
Personal factors tied to sexual satisfaction
Daily emotions and mood
As you may have guessed, sexual well-being is closely tied to daily emotional states. Several studies highlight how fluctuations in mood can ripple into relational and sexual experiences:
A positive mood was linked to increased sexual desire toward partners.
Among women, depressive symptoms were associated with lower sexual function, decreased satisfaction, and more pain with intercourse.
Higher relationship catastrophizing correlated with less sexual satisfaction, more distress, and reduced desire, patterns that also negatively affected partners’ well-being.
Days with heightened attachment anxiety or avoidance were linked to fewer sexual fantasies about one’s partner.
Increased sexual approach motives (seeking sex for closeness, connection, or intimacy) were tied to greater sexual satisfaction.
These findings show that emotions and thoughts affect both partners, not just one.
Pornography use
Pornography use continues to be a debated area of sexual health research, with findings that are often nuanced. Across same-gender/sex and mixed-gender/sex couples:
When women used pornography, both they and their partners reported heightened desire.
When men used pornography, partners tended to report lower desire.
On days when pornography was consumed alone in addition to partnered sex, partners reported higher levels of sexual distress.
For professionals, this illustrates how important contextualizing pornography use is in therapy or education, especially when discussing sexual expectations and relational dynamics.
Relationship-Focused Factors
Unsurprisingly, the quality of daily interactions between partners strongly predicted sexual well-being:
Support and communication: Feeling heard and supported was consistently linked to higher sexual satisfaction.
Affection and responsiveness: Acts of love, affection, and responsiveness promoted more positive sexual health outcomes.
Longer or more satisfying post-sex affection (e.g., cuddling, kissing, intimate conversation) increased sexual satisfaction for both partners.
Withdrawal and rejection: Emotional withdrawal, perceived rejection, and miscommunication contributed to sexual distress.
Attraction and desire: One study found that when individuals reported increased interest in alternative partners, they also reported increased desire for their primary partner. Attraction outside the relationship doesn’t necessarily diminish or intimacy inside it
Pain and pleasure: Individuals with vulvadenia, which is characterized by chronic pain or discomfort of the vulva, reported lower sexual function and greater pain when they received higher solicitous and negative responses
Non-Monogamous Relationships and sexual Satisfaction
Although underrepresented in the research, one study explored CNM couples:
On days when participants engaged in sex with an additional partner, the link between sexual motives and need fulfillment was stronger.
This dynamic was not associated with lower satisfaction in their primary relationship.
More research is clearly needed across different relationship structures to inform inclusive sexual health practices.
Tips for sexual health professionals
Taken together, these patterns demonstrate how intertwined partners’ lives are. Each person’s emotional, cognitive, and relational experiences can shape not only their own outcomes but also their partner’s. For clinicians, this highlights the importance of tailored approaches that promote positive dyadic coping and communication.
Encourage self-monitoring: Drawing on dyadic diary methods, self-monitoring techniques can help clients track thoughts, emotions, and behaviors closer to when interactions occur. Think journals, audio recordings, worksheets, apps that might be engaging and most supportive for your clients. Create new prompts to inspire self-reflection and revisit previous ones to monitor change over time.
Promote sexual mindfulness: Help clients build awareness of their sexual experiences in daily life to improve sexual functioning and intimacy.
Address daily relational dynamics: Small changes, such as fostering intimacy, enhancing communication, or reducing withdrawal, can yield meaningful improvements in sexual satisfaction.
Support couples coping with pain conditions: For clients with vulvodynia, interventions should include partner responses as part of treatment.
Tailor to context: Adapt questions and interventions to the specific identities, experiences, and relationship structures of the individuals you serve.
Sexual health professionals can use these techniques to track meaningful changes in behaviors and attitudes over time and help foster healthier, more satisfying relationships.
Conclusion
“Best practices” in sexual health often reflect the limitations of available research. As professionals, it’s important to recognize both the strengths and constraints of dyadic diary findings. Daily emotions, communication patterns, and relational behaviors clearly play a significant role in shaping sexual satisfaction, but their impact may vary across different populations and relationship structures.
By integrating these insights into practice, sexual health professionals can better support individuals and couples in cultivating healthier, more satisfying sexual relationships.
Want to learn how to support individuals and couples in strengthening their relationships? Become a Dual Certified Couples and Sex Therapist with SHA!
Written by Emma Sell-Goodhand, MPH
Emma is a doctoral student and Global One Health Fellow at North Carolina State University studying adolescent sexual health. She brings prior experience as a Technical Advisor at the World Health Organization.
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