Most people say they want pleasure and closeness from sex, but during sex they typically focus on how they look, smell, and sound; obsess on what their partner is thinking; try to manage distracting thoughts & feelings; and most of all, attend to their performance.
That leads exactly to what so many people fear: sexual “dysfunctions” like erection, orgasm, or desire problems. Therapists and self-help books can make things worse, because they’re trying to improve “functioning”—which is exactly wrong. Better friction doesn’t give people what they really want from sex: a sense of relaxation, playfulness, self-acceptance, and connection. Erections and lubrication don’t guarantee desire or satisfaction. And so treating people’s genitalia is the wrong approach to enhancing their passion or pleasure.
In this seminar we examined:
How to help people identify the good reasons they don’t desire or initiate sex;
How people construct culturally-syntonic sexual narratives—and how we can help patients see and change them;
How to support people in making the transition from lust-driven sex to adult eroticism—and how to help people confront the existential issues that arise when they do;
How we can help people discover what their authentic sexual desires actually are, and how they can share these with a partner;
How to understand the role of Normality Anxiety and existential avoidance in sexual decision-making, and how to discuss this with patients.
After attending this program, participants will be able:
- To describe how people make sex difficult for themselves
- To describe how to help people enjoy sex more
- To assess and discuss patients’ narratives about sex and their sexuality
Dr. Marty Klein has been a California Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist and Certified Sex Therapist for 34 years—that’s some 35,000 sessions with men, women, and couples.
Marty is the award-winning author of seven books on sexuality and relationships, including the ground-breaking Sexual Intelligence. Psychology Today simply says “To improve your sex life, buy this book.” Marty is also the author of many training CDs, DVDs, and webinars.
Marty is frequently quoted by the popular media, such as The New York Times, The New Yorker, National Public Radio, and Huffington Post. Marty is an outspoken critic of many popular and clinical ideas about sexuality and emotional health, and is a dedicated advocate of sexuality training for psychologists, physicians, attorneys, judges, clergy, and school boards.
Marty’s blog and electronic newsletter Sexual Intelligence are frequently cited as sources of innovative thinking about sexuality, culture, politics, and the media. Last year he gave two U.S. Congressional briefings on evidence-based sex education.
Each year Marty trains thousands of physicians, psychologists, and social workers across North America, Europe, and Asia—30 countries to date. Audiences consistently call his talks thought-provoking, down-to-earth, and entertaining. We’re expecting all three.
