Please enable javascript in your browser to view this site!

Sexual Health Blogs

Sex Tape Guide: How to Safely Create Porn with Your Partner(s)

Sex Tape Guide:  How to Safely Create Porn with Your Partner(s)

When people hear “sex tape,” they typically think of the hundreds of celebrity sex scandals that have emerged in popular culture. Stars from the likes of Tommy Lee and Pamela Anderson to Kim Kardashian and Ray J have been front and center in sex tape scandals. While there’s often much speculation about how these tapes get released, there’s no denying that the individuals featured in the tapes are victims of a privacy breach. If a person is in the public spotlight keeping a sex tape private and safe from such security breaches are more complicated. This is because society often sees celebrities as superhuman people, and it’s difficult to imagine them engaging in normal intimate activities such as sex. For women celebrities, the leaking of a sex tape allows the media to capitalize on their sexualization of a star. For women like Pamela Anderson and Kim Kardashian, who have often been described as “bombshell” women, the leaking of a sex tape only leaves society with more room to sexualize them by living out their voyeuristic fantasies of watching those women engage in sexual acts. If your name is in the public eye, you may want to think more carefully about creating a sex tape, and if you do decide to create one, make sure you have a plan for what you would do if the tape were ever leaked.

Fortunately, most of us are not famous, and the media would not be looking for our sex tapes if we created them. This makes the process a bit safer for the average person, though it’s still not impossible for someone in the public eye to create sex tapes and avoid a sex tape scandal. In my opinion, sex tape scandals are over-dramatized, and the shame associated with them is unfair. All of us have sex, and there is nothing wrong with wanting to capture the art and beauty of sex. Sex is art, art that can be sensual and soft or dirty and rough. A sex tape is a medium for the art of sex, and it’s unfair that people get shamed if a tape portraying intimacy they created for their own eyes gets leaked. It’s time that we break the stigma surrounding sex tapes once and for all. Creating a sex tape can be a beautifully thrilling experience. Every sex tape is unique because it depicts intimacy between a particular group of people and portrays a sexual encounter that only exists in that film. If you want tips on creating your first sex tape, keep reading. You may be surprised to find out that there are more pros than cons regarding sex tapes. If you’re concerned about cyber safety when creating your porn, don’t worry, we’ve got you covered there too! 

Cyber Safety and Safe Porn Creation 

Before creating a sex tape, thinking about the safest way to go about the process is essential. In an article for Lelo, writer Colleen Godin notes that “...cyber security should be #1 on your list of concerns when preparing your sex tape for ultimate privacy.” One of her first recommendations is in relation to Apple’s iCloud program. The cloud is notorious for exposing people's private photos and videos. One of the more popular scandals was in 2014 when Jennifer Lawrence's iCloud backup was hacked, and her nude images were leaked online. Godin notes that “...there are myriad ways your data can be accessed when you give your smartphone permission to send all your images and videos into the cloud.” The only way to avoid your videos or photos getting accessed on the cloud is to turn off the syncing feature! This article by Business Insider explains how to do it on all the devices you might use for recording, including iPhones, iPads, and Windows devices. 

After you’ve turned off the cloud syncing feature, you must consider how you will secure the sex tape on your device. Anna Lovine talks about ways to securely store nudes and intimate content in an article for Mashable and notes that if your content is not secured properly, the threat that hackers pose is real. In the article, Lovine interviewed former NSA hacker Patrick Wardle who compared hacking to robbers choosing houses: “ They're not going after the house with the alarm system, they're going after the house with the back door open. The same is true for hackers: They're going after the least-secure devices.” If you have an Apple Device, make sure that you install all of the iOS updates, which, according to Wardle, “...have a lot of fixes and patches for security vulnerabilities.” 

The next preventative measure you can take is to set a unique password for every account on your phone and implement two-factor authentication whenever you can. Wardle also advises avoiding Photo Storage apps on the Apple App store. While these apps may be vetted by Apple, it’s important to remember that once you give them access to your private content, they can do anything they want. This next tip applies to Apple and Android users, ensuring that any app or program you're storing or sending your porn has end-to-end encryption.  In a nutshell, end-to-end encryption means that only the sender and recipient can decrypt and read the content. Snapchat is an example of a platform that has this feature, and this means that if the Snapchat server were hacked, the hacker would not be able to access the file. 

Finally, the best way to ensure the safety of your content is to store it within a safely encrypted folder. In Lovine’s article, Neil Kittleson, a former NSA cybersecurity directorate, advised that the Department of Defense uses specific cryptographic algorithms, and the one they use to protect the confidentiality of data is AES256. Kittelson said that "when you want to encrypt photos on your device, look for applications that use AES256 encryption and make sure you trust the developer that implemented the cryptography." If you want specific recommendations on how to encrypt your device go check out Lovine’s article to read Kittleson’s tips.  

The number one rule to safe porn creation is consent and clear communication. Make sure to plan out every activity you wish to engage in during the sex tape and ensure that each partner consents. Things can also change at the moment during filming, so be sure to continue the consent dialogue throughout the entire process. It’s essential to make sure you and your partner discuss consent and communicate all your wishes clearly regarding your porn. If you’re in a relationship with the person you choose to create a sex tape with, you may want to think about what would happen if the two of you broke up. Godin warns that “...you need to prepare for the worst when it comes to your digital footprint.” To protect yourself, you need to ask yourself the following questions: Would you want your partner to be able to keep a copy? Would you prefer they delete the tape immediately? Could you foresee your partner trying to use it as revenge porn if things got ugly between you two? The fact is that this sex tape belongs to you and your partner only, as it’s an explicit depiction of intimacy. The conversation around how you want to store the sex tape needs to be had, as the release of a tape could be unfairly detrimental to a person’s public image. In my experience, my past partners and I have always decided to keep our sex tapes. Still, we have an explicit agreement on where to store the video, and some of us have agreed that it’s even okay to share the videos with people as long as we ask the other for clear permission. Other people, may want to delete their homemade porn after viewing it once or a few times. How you store or dispose of your video is entirely up to you, but make sure that you carefully think through and plan the process to ensure your and your partner's safety. 

Tips For Creating Your Own Sex Tape 

Now that we’ve reviewed the importance of cybersecurity and safe porn-creation practices, we can finally get to the fun part, creating your sex tape! The first thing to think about when creating a sex tape is your vision. What are your intentions for recording a sex tape? Discuss this with your partner and consider how your intentions for creating homemade porn may intersect with your overall vision for the content. For example, if one of your intentions is to spice things up in your relationship and possibly fulfill a voyeuristic fantasy, you may envision a more sexually--charged tape. On the other hand, if your intention lies on the opposite end of the spectrum and you wish to document the love and intimacy that sex depicts, you may have a gentler, more romantic vision for your scene. Setting your intention and vision for your sex tape can be an intense bonding experience for you and your sexual partner. Homemade porn deserves to have an artistic process and granting your porn that process will only bring you and your partner closer. It will not only excite you for the execution of your vision but also discover a lot about your partner's erotic wants and desires through what they want to record. The next step is to set boundaries by figuring out precisely what you wish to record. In an article by Aidan Milan for Metro, sex therapist, and researcher Dr. Laura Vowels advises a person to ask their “...partner whether they want to incorporate certain sex toys, positions or role-play scenes into the tape…discuss the intended length of filming, and whether either of you would want to experiment with different filming angles.” Once you’ve established your intent, vision, and boundaries, it’s time to start thinking about the execution of your fantasy! 

There are many cheap or free ways to film and edit yourself in a flattering, arousing fashion. Godin recommends a smartphone or camera tripod for those who prefer not to hold the camera or clumsily change angels a million times. The good thing about a tripod is that it provides stability, and if you use an octopus-style tripod, it will bend and fold to your needs so you can seamlessly change angles. You also want to think about where you will film the sex tape and factor in the lighting and aesthetics of the location. For example, if you decide to film the video in your bedroom, think about how you would acquire adequate lighting in that space. Try to avoid harsh, direct lighting and aim for soft ambient lighting. If you’re handy, you can install a dimmer on your light or even drape a sheer curtain over a lamp to soften the light. You could also opt for orange bulbs, providing a soft, warm glowing light for the film. Supplementing the light with candles is another great way to add to the ambiance. Next, you want to stage the area and ensure it’s visually pleasing. Make sure the area is clean; you don't wish to dirty old socks or old water bottles lying around in your sex tape! Staging the area is not just limited to the background; it also includes the stars in the film! Finally, take special care of your appearance and dress in a way that makes you feel sensual and sexy. Consider that if you want to wear lingerie or role-play in specific clothes with your partner, consider that. The bottom line is that you should feel confident and sexy in front of the camera, and it’s important not to skip out on this part when preparing to create homemade porn. If you look your best, you will feel confident on camera, which will help combat any anxiety or awkwardness during filming.  

Once you're all prepared to film, it’s time to get in front of the camera! A pro tip is to engage in foreplay before turning on the camera so you and your partner are turned on and focusing more on each other than the fact that you are being recorded. It’s no secret that the best porn is authentic porn in which all parties are experiencing genuine arousal and pleasure. Mainstream porn can offer unrealistic depictions of sex, and if you try to mimic mainstream pornography, you may be left feeling unfulfilled or frustrated. Thanks to TV shows and movies, there is a popularized preconceived notion of how a sex tape should look. When we get caught up in this thought, we stop enjoying the actual experience of making it. Focus instead on the pleasure you and your partner give to give to each other and do what feels pleasurable for both of you. Make your sex tape personal, and do what you know to get your partner off. It will be most arousing to watch your sex tape if you're genuinely interested in your partner’s orgasm during filming. No matter what, remember just to be yourself and do what feels natural. Raw, natural sex is beautiful, and there is nothing more genuine than an authentic depiction of intimacy. If you follow these tips, your sex tape will be a product of art that is visually pleasing and authentically sexy when you are finished. Good luck, and happy creating!

Written by Alyssa Morterud.

Could you have a career in the sexual health field? If you find this topic interesting, take our 1 minute quiz to see which sexuality certification is right for you!