Sitophilia is the sexual desire for situations involving food. This fetish, also known as “food play” is a relatively common practice, especially considering the scope by which you can define “food.” Recently, this practice has been known as “sploshing,” a subcategory of the “Wet and Messy” fetish which consists of covering yourself or others in non-bodily liquids. Food play is more commonly depicted in media and film than other fetishes. In the 1999 film Varsity Blues, a character covers herself in whipped cream, with cherry nipples. In 50 Shades of Grey, the characters lick ice cream off of each other. While food play is definitely considered a fetish, it has been normalized in mainstream media, more so than many of the other still quite common fetishes.
The draw to experiment with food play seems to come from a number of factors. First, using these items provides tactile stimulation, adding an element of texture to the sense of touch. There are also ways to play with temperature, which can provide additional stimulation. Food play carries the notion of being “taboo” because we are taught that food is not to be played with. Surprisingly, food and sex are closely related in terms of brain function; they each satisfy a biological urge, so combining the two supposedly heightens these experiences. Certain foods are even thought to heighten sexual experience when consumed, such as oysters or chocolate. These foods are called aphrodisiacs, and are commonly referenced in media as the best foods to eat on a date. Food play may also be connected to BDSM, where the messiness of the food serves to humiliate or victimize the submissive.
If you are looking to get into food play, a good place to start is by eating food with your partner(s), focusing on the sensuality of the experience. Lips, tongues, and saliva are both sexy and necessary for eating, so use your imagination to connect the two! A common example is whipped cream or chocolate sauce, which can be licked off of another person’s body. Alcohol is also commonly involved in food play, such as “body shots” where one person consumes alcohol off of another person’s body. More adventurous ideas include bathing in a tub of soup or sauce, eating a full meal while using your partner’s body as a plate, and penetrating or being penetrated by a food object. As with any fetish, ideas are plentiful in the world of online pornography, so feel free to explore food play videos (that are ethically made and consensual!). Some people also enjoy watching others eat or feeding others; mukbang videos, where one person eats large quantities over livestream, are a popular version of this fetish.
For vagina-owners, be aware that outside substances can change your natural pH level if they enter your vaginal canal, which can cause infections. Don’t worry, if you are prone to infections, you can still participate! Consider moving from food play to a steamy shower sesh, then returning to the bedroom once clean. Alternatively, take advantage of your many erogenous zones and experiment with food play on your nipples, neck, earlobes, etc.!
When exploring a new fetish, talking to your partner is the most important step. All parties should enter the conversation with an open mind, prepared to share honestly your desires and limitations. Being upfront about what you need or want in the relationship is critical, but be sure to also leave space to hear how your partner feels. The goal is primarily for everyone to feel safe and comfortable, and secondarily to explore new avenues in your sex life. You may also want to consider your own boundaries, and advocate for them in your conversation. An example may be, “I am really excited about the idea of bringing chocolate sauce into the bedroom, but I don’t feel comfortable yet with the idea of being penetrated with a food item.” Exploring new sexual fantasies can be incredibly rewarding for everyone involved, but only if every person is free to share their feelings and ask questions.
During this conversation and every time you practice intimacy, establish consent from your partner(s). Outline what you are and are not comfortable with, and be open to hearing the same from your partner(s). With any kink or fetish play, it can be helpful to establish a safeword, which anyone can say to immediately pause the sexual interaction. This helps to reinforce boundaries and create a sense of safety within intimacy. If you’re interested in learning more about the world of kink, check out SHA’s Kink-Informed Certificate program taught by the Supernova of Kink herself, Midori.
By Sydney Sullivan