Pleasure is often treated as an afterthought in conversations about sexual health—but according to Venus O’Hara, it should be central. In a recent Sexual Health Alliance interview with Venus O’Hara, she shared powerful insights on pleasure, intention, communication, and why understanding our bodies can transform not only our sex lives, but our relationships, confidence, and emotional well-being.
Venus O’Hara is a pleasure educator, product expert, author, podcaster, and meditation creator whose work spans sexuality, wellness, and lifestyle education. With over a decade of experience reviewing pleasure products, hosting a top-ranked podcast, and creating educational content across platforms, she brings a deeply nuanced and embodied perspective to sexual wellness—one that moves far beyond mechanics or performance.
Pleasure Starts With Intention
One of the most important ideas Venus returns to throughout the conversation is intention. She notes that many people engage in sexual activity without ever being taught to ask why they’re doing it. Are they seeking connection? Validation? Distraction? Instant gratification?
This lack of awareness can leave people disconnected from their own pleasure and unsure how to advocate for themselves. Venus emphasizes that learning to pause and reflect on intention is not only informative, but empowering. When people understand their motivations, they gain more agency in their sexual experiences—and often feel more grounded in other areas of life as well.
This kind of reflective awareness is rarely taught in traditional sex education, yet it’s foundational to healthy sexuality.
From Real Estate to Pleasure Education
Venus’s path into sexual wellness was anything but conventional. She began her career in luxury real estate before launching a sex blog in 2009, inspired by clients who were building online businesses. That blog quickly opened doors to book deals, media collaborations, and opportunities to review pleasure products—eventually leading to work in toy design, online education, podcasting, and meditation.
What stands out about Venus’s career is its multidimensional nature. She writes, records videos, hosts a podcast, creates guided meditations, and designs educational experiences—often working in alignment with her natural rhythms rather than forcing productivity.
Her journey reflects an important truth about modern sexual wellness work: there is no single path. Education, creativity, and lived experience often intersect in powerful ways.
Expanding Pleasure Paradigms and Sex Educator Certification
Having reviewed well over a thousand pleasure products, Venus has witnessed major shifts in how pleasure is understood and designed. She describes being especially excited by new pleasure paradigms—toys that move instead of vibrate, use air technology, or focus on teasing and anticipation rather than climax alone.
One trend she finds particularly compelling is the rise of wearable pleasure products, which emphasize connection, playfulness, and shared experience with a partner. Rather than replacing intimacy, these tools often enhance communication and complicity, creating space for curiosity and foreplay.
This evolution challenges outdated narratives that frame pleasure products as cold, unnecessary, or competitive with partners. Instead, Venus positions them as tools for exploration, sensation, and connection—to oneself and others. With a sex educator certification from SHA, students learn how to shift the pleasure paradigm.
The Mind-Body Connection Matters More Than the Toy
When asked about favorite types of toys, Venus avoids naming a single category. Instead, she stresses the importance of variety and experimentation. Relying on the same stimulation over and over—whether with toys or without—can limit pleasure and awareness.
She shares a personal story about a toy breaking mid-orgasm, which ultimately helped her discover that pleasure wasn’t about the device itself, but about her mind-body connection. Developing an internal narrative and cultivating presence allowed her to experience pleasure across many different forms of stimulation.
This insight is especially valuable for anyone teaching or talking about sexual wellness: tools can support pleasure, but embodiment and awareness are what sustain it.
Pleasure Products as Experiences, Not Objects
One of Venus’s most resonant statements is this: a sex toy is not a product—it’s an experience.
For some people, that experience represents hope after years of disconnection, or the possibility of pleasure for the first time. Venus challenges the idea that pleasure tools are frivolous or superficial, pointing instead to their emotional and psychological impact.
Pleasure, she reminds us, is not optional. It’s a meaningful part of human well-being, influencing confidence, self-esteem, and how people show up in their relationships.
Communication, Conflict, and Sexuality: A staple in Sex Educator Certification
Beyond pleasure products, Venus is deeply interested in communication—especially how misunderstandings arise so easily in relationships. She speaks about learning to leverage conflict rather than fear it, using disagreements as opportunities for deeper connection.
Sexuality, she explains, is connected to far more than sex. It touches self-worth, emotional regulation, boundaries, and how people navigate intimacy across different life stages. Curiosity, play, and openness to growth are essential—not just in the bedroom, but in relationships as a whole.
Why Long-Form Sexual Education Still Matters
Venus also highlights the importance of podcasts and long-form platforms in a world of increasing censorship. While social media often restricts sexual health content, podcasts and educational spaces allow for honest, nuanced conversations without dilution.
Her podcast frames sexuality as part of an “orgasmic lifestyle”—one that includes wellness, spirituality, nutrition, creativity, and relationships. This holistic approach makes sexual health more accessible, less stigmatized, and easier to integrate into everyday life.
A Message for the Next Generation
If Venus could leave one message for the next generation, it would be this: pleasure matters, and self-knowledge is powerful.
She speaks candidly about the importance of masturbation as a tool for self-discovery and empowerment—something many people were never taught. Learning how to understand and meet her own needs transformed her life, confidence, and relationship choices. She has witnessed similar transformations in others through informal coaching and education.
Pleasure education, she believes, helps people make healthier emotional decisions, leave toxic dynamics, and trust their bodies more fully.
Sex Educator Certification: Where Education Fits In
While this conversation centers on lived experience and curiosity, it also highlights why structured education matters. Many professionals drawn to this work choose to formalize their knowledge through programs like a sex educator certification with Sexual Health Alliance, gaining ethical frameworks and evidence-based tools to support others responsibly.
Sexual Health Alliance offers training for those who want to bring informed, inclusive, pleasure-positive education into the world—whether through teaching, content creation, coaching, or public education.
Pleasure is not a side note
Venus O’Hara’s work reminds us that pleasure is not a side note—it’s a gateway to deeper connection, confidence, and self-understanding. When people are taught to listen to their bodies and reflect on their intentions, sexuality becomes less confusing and more empowering.
Conversations like this are why sexual wellness education continues to evolve—and why thoughtful, curiosity-driven voices like Venus’s are so important right now.
Want to become an in-demand sexual health professional? Learn more about becoming certified with SHA!
