By Eliza Sea
Conference Registration HERE for October 9th & Oct 10th
Image credit: Decolonize Pussy Power, Faviana Rodriguez, 2014
Decolonize Your Sex
“Systems of oppression directly impact our pleasure and our sexual life. I think if people actually understood that racism, classism, ableism, transphobia and femmephobia, directly impact our sexual expression – then they would actually understand sex. I think people try to put the cart before the horse. You have to talk about how your body has been regarded as a black person, before you fuck, before you start talking about who you’re attracted to.” - Erika Hart, 2020.
In reclaiming our sexualities it needs to be discussed how racism, ableism, transphobia, colourism, just to name a few, have perpetuated an othering when it comes to individuals who have faced the constant oppression of colonized systems. Being able to see perspectives that include intergenerational trauma and institutionalized racism are essential to sexual activism and practices of decolonizing and inclusion. (Hart, 2020.) Changing the narratives around sex and pleasure require a reclaiming of the power in sexual experience while actively pushing against institutional norms that center white heteronormativity.
Image credit: @feministsexed
Lorde [Audre] asks us to do the more difficult and radical work of imagining what our realities might look like if masculinity were not the ideal to which we aspire, if heterosexuality were not the ideal to which we aspire, if whiteness were not the ideal to which we aspire. (Gay, 2020.)
Decolonizing your sex means decentering whiteness and when it comes to sexuality, decentering the white gaze. Conventional beauty ideals and its relationship to sexual expression require continuous unpacking and addressing with cultural competency at the forefront of decolonizing our sex. In her book Pleasure Activism, adrienne maree brown discusses many aspects of sexual activism and weaves social justice practices with the human experience of pleasure. (brown, 2020.) To begin a practice in decolonizing sex, starting with self is critical – in the words of RuPaul, “If you can’t love yourself, how the hell are you going to love somebody else!”
We have a deeper socialization to overcome, one that tells us that most of us don’t matter – our lives don’t matter – not as much as those of white men. We need to learn how to practice love such that care – for ourselves and others – is understood as political resistance and cultivating resilience. (brown, 2020.)
There is great power that comes with a sexual sense of self – knowing and connecting to ourselves in this way allows for deeper connections with our strongest feelings and desires begins a practice of decolonizing for all individuals that have participated in or have been oppressed by the institutionalized systems.
“It is an internal sense of satisfaction to which, once we have experienced it, we know we can aspire. For having experienced the fullness of this depth of feeling and recognizing its power, in honour and self-respect we can require no less of ourselves.” (Lorde, 1978.)
Continuing Education for Decolonizing Your Sex
N. Jasmine Johnson - MSW, MA, LCSW, is a licensed clinical therapist, the co-founder of her own adult film production company called Royal Fetish Films, owner of Blue Pearl Therapy, amongst many other accomplishments states that, “We wanted to provide a representation of black and brown people in a way we could all get behind” (Johnson, J.)
SHA is thrilled to welcome N. Jasmine Johnson October 9th and 10th to our online conference series. This two day workshop will address confronting the unconventional - decolonizing practices in sex, love and lifestyle in practice as well as sex work, trauma, kink and much more.
References
brown, a. m. (2019). Pleasure Activism. AK Press.
brown, a.m. (2020, June 28). A word for white people, in two parts. Retrieved Oct 01, 2020,from http://adriennemareebrown.net/2020/06/28/a-word-for-white-people-in-two-parts/comment-page-1/.
Gay, R. (2020, September 17). The Legacy of Audre Lorde. Retrieved September 29, 2020, from https://www.theparisreview.org/blog/2020/09/17/the-legacy-of-audre-lorde/
Lorde, A., & Browne, M. L. (2020). Sister outsider. NY, NY: Penguin Books. Original essay, 1978.
The Triple Cripples. (2020, March 15). Ericka Hart on decolonising gender, sex education and medicine: Gal-dem. Retrieved October 03, 2020, from https://gal-dem.com/the-world-according-to-ericka-hart/
Edited by Alex Whitman
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