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Sexual Health Blogs

High Praise for Dr. Justin Lehmiller! Our 2018-2019 Speaker for Sexual Health Alliance!

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Our Sexceptional Lecturer, Dr. Justin Lehmiller continues to outstanding praise and media coverage. He has been on a world tour with the Sexual Health Alliance to deliver trainings to all types of professionals in Denver, CO, Austin, TX, Dallas, TX, Los Angelos, CA, Chicago, IL and Seattle, WA. Visit our Events tab at the top of the page to find all upcoming events!

TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT Book tour Media Coverage

Major features (print and online)

Health.com  

http://www.health.com/sex/most-common-sexual-fantasies-explained

The Wall Street Journal

https://www.wsj.com/articles/new-research-delves-into-sexual-fantasies-1529936957

The Australian (reprint of WSJ article)

https://www.theaustralian.com.au/business/wall-street-journal/sexual-fantasy-survey-uncovers-surprising-insights/news-story/092923a06a8a4d34ecd7539f2b462ecd

The New Zealand Herald (reprint of WSJ article)

https://www.nzherald.co.nz/relationships/news/article.cfm?c_id=41&objectid=12081088

The Daily Mail (U.K.)

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5883591/Americans-crave-group-sex-largest-domestic-survey-sexual-fantasies-reveals.html 

NUVO (Indianapolis paper)

https://www.nuvo.net/arts/summer-reads-new-books-by-indy-authors/article_5ff70a50-798b-11e8-8149-830546771d79.html 

De Morgen (Begium newspaper)

https://www.demorgen.be/wetenschap/meeste-mensen-dromen-van-triootje-maar-doen-het-daarom-nog-niet-b8f9583c/

Bustle

https://www.bustle.com/p/the-7-most-popular-sexual-fantasies-according-to-4000-americans-9615180

Mel Magazine

https://melmagazine.com/americans-crave-group-sex-fc57e932b3ae

Livestrong

https://www.livestrong.com/article/13713594-the-most-popular-sexual-fantasy-americans-have/

https://www.livestrong.com/slideshow/13713927-the-psychology-behind-8-popular-american-sexual-fantasies/

The Sunday Times (U.K.)

https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/tell-me-what-you-want-an-exclusive-extract-from-dr-justin-lehmiller-s-new-book-exploring-what-your-sexual-fantasies-say-about-you-zl7w535ml

https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/editor-s-letter-lorraine-candy-on-sexual-fantasies-and-dr-justin-lehmiller-s-new-book-tell-me-what-you-want-jsctrbhx6

Psychology Today 

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/standard-deviations/201807/fantasy-island-research-probes-the-science-sexual-desire (book review by Michael Aaron)

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/stepmonster/201807/what-we-think-about-when-we-think-about-and-have-sex (Q&A with Wednesday Martin)

https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/the-myths-sex/201807/the-deeper-psychological-meaning-behind-your-sex-fantasies

https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/the-myths-sex/201807/where-do-our-sexual-fantasies-come

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-myths-sex/201808/why-do-we-have-sex-fantasies-its-about-more-pleasure

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-myths-sex/201808/what-your-sexual-fantasies-reveal-about-your-personality

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/women-who-stray/201807/the-politics-cuckolding (post by David Ley)

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-myths-sex/201809/4-uncommon-sexual-fantasies-and-what-they-mean

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-myths-sex/201809/what-do-our-sexual-fantasies-say-about-who-we-are

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-myths-sex/201810/seven-fascinating-facts-about-sexual-fantasies

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/sex-matters/201811/new-research-might-be-able-predict-your-sexual-fantasies (post by Ari Tuckman)

Herald Sun (Australia)

https://www.heraldsun.com.au/lifestyle/relationships/a-new-survey-has-revealed-what-we-really-fantasise-about-in-bed-and-how-it-varies/news-story/3803c10ad386aa8e38b4656034403d60

The Sun (U.K.)

https://www.thesun.co.uk/fabulous/6671001/six-common-sexual-fantasies-revealed/

https://www.thesun.co.uk/fabulous/6653023/heres-what-your-sexual-fantasies-say-about-your-personality-and-it-turns-out-women-like-it-rougher-than-men/

https://www.thesun.co.uk/fabulous/6757293/two-year-sex-survey-brits/

https://www.thesun.co.uk/fabulous/7562703/sexual-fantasies-personality/ 


Daily Mirror (U.K.)

https://www.mirror.co.uk/lifestyle/sex-relationships/sex/top-6-most-common-sexual-12839475

https://www.mirror.co.uk/lifestyle/health/how-improve-your-sex-life-12895401

Bild (German tabloid)

https://m.bild.de/unterhaltung/erotik/sex-und-liebe/von-diesem-sex-traeumen-wir-am-haeufigsten-56185836.bildMobile.html

goop

https://goop.com/wellness/sexual-health/how-the-science-of-sexual-desire-can-improve-your-sex-life/?ref=newsletter

Metro (U.K.)

https://metro.co.uk/2018/07/07/seven-common-sexual-fantasies-7690384/ 

The I (U.K.)

https://inews.co.uk/opinion/the-most-unusual-sexual-fantasies-from-the-largest-ever-survey-and-what-they-tell-us/

https://inews.co.uk/opinion/the-deeper-psychological-needs-behind-your-sexual-fantasies/ 

The Independent (U.K.)

https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/common-sexual-fantasies-threesomes-bdsm-public-american-a8438566.html

VICE/TONIC (book excerpt)

https://tonic.vice.com/en_us/article/evk8ae/how-to-stop-feeling-guilty-about-what-you-want-in-bed
USA Today

https://usat.ly/2uacwCS

Republished in the Battle Creek Enquirer (Michigan) in print

Ask Me Anything on Reddit (July 10)

https://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/8xr09r/i_am_justin_lehmiller_a_research_fellow_at_the/ 

New York Journal of Books (review)

https://www.nyjournalofbooks.com/book-review/tell-me

Naked at Our Age by Joan Price (review)

http://betterthanieverexpected.blogspot.com/2018/07/tell-me-what-you-want-by-justin.html

The Atlantic

https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2018/07/sexual-fantasies-justin-lehmiller/565547/

The Indianapolis Star

https://www.indystar.com/story/entertainment/arts/2018/07/19/kinsey-sex-doc-most-common-sexual-fantasy-america/786609002/

Republished in USA Today: https://www.usatoday.com/story/life/nation-now/2018/07/19/kinsey-institute-sex-researcher-sexual-fantasies/800581002/

Republished in Cincinnati Enquirer: https://www.cincinnati.com/story/entertainment/arts/2018/07/19/kinsey-sex-doc-most-common-sexual-fantasy-america/786609002/

Republished in Louisville Courier Journal: https://www.courier-journal.com/story/entertainment/arts/2018/07/20/most-common-sexual-fantasy-america/807749002/ 

The Cut

https://www.thecut.com/article/what-its-like-to-be-a-sex-researcher.html
CNN

https://www.cnn.com/2018/07/24/health/sex-fantasies-kerner/index.html

Republished in CNN Chile: https://www.cnnchile.com/tendencias/esto-es-lo-que-tus-fantasias-sexuales-dicen-sobre-ti_20181020/ 

Chicago Tribune

http://www.chicagotribune.com/lifestyles/stevens/ct-life-stevens-monday-americans-sexual-fantasies-0730-story.html

Republished in Arizona Daily Star: https://tucson.com/lifestyles/balancing-act-americans-no-sexual-fantasy-survey-says/article_a1af8470-daec-56cf-880f-620e7c39ec7d.html 

Republished in the Santa Barbara News Press (print only)

Of Sex and Love Blog (review)

http://ofsexandlove.com/tell-me-what-you-want

Boston Globe

https://www.bostonglobe.com/lifestyle/2018/08/10/tell-what-you-want-looks-sexual-fantasies-and-science-desire/rEugCse6UDX3KjJuQ03srK/story.html

Fatherly

https://www.fatherly.com/love-money/sex/sex-fantasies-common-desire-shame-research/

Men’s Health Magazine (print) – “Ask an Advisor” feature entitled “Reel Sex” published in the September 2018 issue

Romance Daily News

https://www.romancedailynews.com/trends 

RealClearLife

http://www.realclearlife.com/books/americas-sexual-fantasies-laid-bare-new-book/ 

Yahoo Brazil

https://br.vida-estilo.yahoo.com/casais-acham-mais-facil-fazer-sexo-que-revelar-fantasias-diz-pesquisador-233903997.html

Broadly

https://broadly.vice.com/en_us/article/qvmynb/five-most-common-sexual-kinks-fantasies

Maxim

https://www.maxim.com/maxim-man/most-popular-kinks-in-america-2018-9 


NUVO (online and in print)

https://www.nuvo.net/arts/tell-me-what-you-want-science-and-sexual-fantasy/article_89047c0e-c100-11e8-bab7-8be69baf5fd0.html

Brides.com

https://www.brides.com/story/fantasize-about-your-partner

The New York Times (review)

https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/17/books/review/tell-me-what-you-want-justin-lehmiller.html

Published in print on October 21, 2018

Huffington Post

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/what-your-sexual-fantasies-reveal-about-you_n_5bc8b6d3e4b0a8f17eea3227

Elite Daily

https://www.elitedaily.com/p/what-do-your-sexual-fantasies-reveal-about-your-personality-this-study-is-mindblowing-12753040

Politico (op-ed written by me)

https://www.politico.com/magazine/story/2018/10/27/sexual-fantasies-republicans-democrats-politics-221919

Covered in Rolling Stone

https://www.rollingstone.com/politics/politics-news/republican-democrat-different-sexual-fantasies-748265/amp/

Covered in Yahoo

https://www.yahoo.com/entertainment/republicans-democrats-divided-sexual-fantasies-182845074.html 

Covered in Yahoo News UK

https://sports.yahoo.com/left-wingers-right-wingers-different-sexual-fantasies-124251689.html 

Covered in Indy100

https://www.indy100.com/article/midterms-2018-sex-fantasy-study-sexual-republican-democrat-bdsm-infedelity-8608851 

Covered in IFL Science

https://www.iflscience.com/editors-blog/republicans-and-democrats-have-very-different-sexual-fantasies/

Covered in LGBTQ Nation

https://www.lgbtqnation.com/2018/10/republicans-democrats-vastly-different-sexual-fantasies-reason-fascinating/ 

Covered in Inquisitor

https://www.inquisitr.com/5136903/republicans-democrats-divided-on-sexual-fantasies-as-well-as-politics/amp/

Covered on The Late Show With Stephen Colbert

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3neoZaTEUeM&feature=youtu.be 

Information (Danish newspaper)

https://www.information.dk/kultur/2018/10/bogkort-forskellene-paa-maend-kvinders-sexfantasier-mindre-forventet 

Glamour Paris

https://www.glamourparis.com/amour-et-sexe/news/articles/tell-me-what-you-want-le-livre-qui-en-dit-long-sur-votre-sexualite/70274#Echobox=1541604184 

The California Therapist (book review by Dr. Marty Klein in the September/October 2018 issue)

http://viewer.zmags.com/publication/8054e4ab#/8054e4ab/80 

Book review by author Piers Anthony in his HiPiers newsletter (November 2018)

http://hipiers.com/newsletter.html 

Forthcoming:

Cosmo – book will be featured in Sex Q&A (October). Will also be mentioned in January issue in a piece on fantasies

Psychology Today (print edition – they will be reprinting some of my blog posts about the book in the November/December issue)

Playboy (German Edition) - November

Radio, Podcasts, and TV

Savage Lovecast – interview with Dan Savage on July 3, 2018

https://www.savagelovecast.com/episodes/610#.Wz5GgWaZPUJ 

Sex with Dr. Jess Podcast – interview on July 6, 2018

https://www.sexwithdrjess.com/2018/07/what-do-your-neighbors-fantasize-about/

Pleasure Mechanics Podcast – July 13, 2018

http://www.pleasuremechanics.com/tell-me-what-you-want-exploring-sexual-fantasy-with-justin-lehmiller-ph-d/ 

Talk Louisiana – July 18, 2018

http://wrkf.org/post/wednesday-june-18th-roger-villere-bruce-herschensohn-justin-lehmiller 

Airtalk (NPR and KPCC) – August 6, 2018

https://www.scpr.org/programs/airtalk/2018/08/06/63458/when-it-comes-to-sex-what-s-normal-the-science-of/

You: The Owner’s Manual (Radio MD) – August 7, 2018

http://radiomd.com/show/you-the-owners-manual-radio-show/item/38100-ep-907b-improve-your-sex-life 

The Psychology Podcast with Dr. Scott Barry Kaufman – recorded August 22, 2018

https://scottbarrykaufman.com/podcast/the-science-of-sexual-fantasies-with-justin-lehmiller/ 

Covered in Scientific American: https://blogs.scientificamerican.com/beautiful-minds/podcast-recap-october-2018-sexual-fantasies-dna-habits-and-perfect-timing/ 

Her podcast (Radio MD) – recorded August 23, 2018

http://radiomd.com/show/her/item/38121-sexual-fantasies 

Me Time with Frangela (Television program) – August 23, 2018 and October 23, 2018

Science of Sex podcast with Dr. Zhana Vrangalova – recorded September 26, 2018

https://scienceofsexpodcast.com/42-what-your-sexual-fantasies-say-about-you/ 

Doctor Radio (Sirius XM) with Dr. Virginia Sadock – October 1, 2018

Savage Lovecast (second appearance) – recorded on October 9, 2018

https://www.savagelovecast.com/episodes/626#.W89E0i-ZPUI 

Tell Me Everything (Sirius XM) – Interview with John Fugelsang – October 16, 2018

Sex with Emily podcast – October 23, 2018

http://sexwithemily.com/26352-2/ 

Sexology podcast with Dr. Nazanin Moali – recorded November 2, 2018

http://www.sexologypodcast.com/2018/11/13/sexual-fantasies-justin-lehmiller/ 

The Ersties Podcast (based in Berlin, Germany) - November 13, 2018

Sex with Strangers podcast – November 13, 2018

BBC Radio – Sex Takeover – November 20, 2018

Why Are People Into That?! Podcast – December 10, 2018

Book Mentions (not specifically about the book, but mention the book)

Cosmo

https://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/a20967150/dry-orgasm-no-ejaculation/

Playboy

https://www.playboy.com/read/the-peak-of-pegging-why-anal-eroticism-is-everywhere-in-porn-and-pop-culture-1

https://www.playboy.com/read/how-should-we-think-about-forced-sex-fantasies-in-the-era-of-metoo

VICE/TONIC

https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/3k449v/inside-the-disturbing-forum-incels-use-to-brutally-criticize-each-others-faces

https://tonic.vice.com/en_us/article/9k88b5/trying-not-to-think-about-sex-just-makes-you-think-about-sex-more 

https://tonic.vice.com/en_us/article/7xqq4g/women-short-orgasms

https://tonic.vice.com/en_us/article/9km7mp/we-fantasize-about-our-romantic-partners-more-than-anyone-else

IO Donna (Italian women’s magazine)

https://www.iodonna.it/benessere/amore-e-sesso/2018/06/29/i-miti-sullorientamento-sessuale-sfatati-dalla-scienza/ 

Prevention

https://www.prevention.com/sex/a21969931/sex-addiction-signs/

Metro (UK)

https://metro.co.uk/2018/07/23/people-call-sexual-partners-daddy-7747622/

Quartz

https://qz.com/1348381/the-way-psychologists-talk-about-sex-reveals-exactly-what-they-get-wrong-about-our-inner-lives/

Women’s Health (Australia)

https://www.womenshealth.com.au/what-to-do-sexless-marriage

Queerty

https://www.queerty.com/homophobic-republicans-prone-gay-sex-scandals-according-one-psychologist-20180812

Chicago Tribune (online and in print)

http://www.chicagotribune.com/redeye/culture/ct-redeye-ask-anna-cross-dressing-fantasy-20180815-story.html

Patch.com

https://patch.com/pennsylvania/northwhitehall/lccc-holds-sexual-health-intimate-relationships-wellness-conf

Bustle

https://www.bustle.com/p/morning-sex-may-make-you-more-productive-a-new-survey-says-11460888


The Science Advice Goddess - column by Amy Alkon

(Syndicated in about 100 newspapers, many of which are print only)

https://www.creators.com/read/advice-goddess-amy-alkon/09/18/codger-and-me

NUVO

https://www.nuvo.net/arts/banned-books-week-addresses-pornography/article_207ecb3e-c13d-11e8-92bf-cf73ced716d2.html

The Advocate (October/November print issue and also online)

https://www.advocate.com/love-and-sex/2018/9/21/what-do-adults-fantasize-about#slide-0 


The Atlantic

https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2018/10/premarital-cohabitation-divorce/573817/ 

Mel Magazine

https://melmagazine.com/en-us/story/why-were-all-so-thirsty-for-blood 

https://melmagazine.com/en-us/story/the-enduring-appeal-of-the-erotic-maid

Toronto Sun

https://torontosun.com/life/relationships/why-do-men-send-unsolicited-d-pics/amp

An Outpouring of Kindness Benefitting the Kind Clinic this Thursday!

AUSTIN - Hang out at Pour Choices this Thursday evening and half of the tab goes towards The Kind Clinic!

PLUS The Sexual Health Alliance is a sponsor and we will have prizes and giveaways including tix to our next event!!

The Kind Clinic is an AMAZING resource in ATX. They offer FREE services and support to the community on all things sexual health and wellness related. See you there!!

Interview Dr. Richard Sprott on kink aware therapy & research

The Sexual Health Alliance interviews Dr. Richard Sprott with Heather McPherson, LMFT-S, LPC-S, CST.

Richard Sprott received his Ph.D. in Developmental Psychology from UC Berkeley in 1994. As a researcher he has examined in detail the relationship between professional identity development and the development of professional ethics in medical doctors, ministers and teachers, and professional identity development in emerging fields of work.

Richard currently teaches courses in the Department of Human Development and Women’s Studies at California State University, East Bay and graduate and undergraduate level courses at various universities in the Bay Area, including UC Berkeley, the California Institute of Integral Studies, and Holy Names University.  He currently is Executive Director of CARAS – Community-Academic Consortium for Research on Alternative Sexualities.

SHA @ AASECT

Denver Happy Hour

We are pleased to invite you and your friends to an impromptu Happy Hour with Giveaways and Games sponsored by The Sexual Health Alliance, Uberlube, MysteryVibe and More on Friday June 15th @ 5:30pm Lobby Bar. Our Community Director, Emily Bridge, LPC alongside Samar Poorlakani, LPC will be handling Bingo Bango! and more fun (yes, similar to last year in Vegas). 

Hang out with us and learn about our upcoming full certification program we are developing with Dr. Chris Donaghue and all the other fun programs we run in our three regions and 7 cities.

The Sexual Health Alliance provides local training and community to all professionals and non-professionals. Our events and programming are intended to build community, spark dialogue and encourage collaboration. We build communities that are well-informed and all inclusive. We recognize that general therapists and medical professionals receive little to no education in sexuality in graduate training programs and it is a significant issue. We’re dedicated to bringing the brightest minds and biggest game changers in sexual health to the Southwest, Great Lakes, and Golden Coast. See you there! 

2018 Personal Letter about the Future of The Sexual Health Alliance

Berlin Wall.jpg

Dear SHA Enthusiasts,
We have come a long way in such a short time and that's all thanks to the many that support us, show up, volunteer and contribute. Great friends and enthusiastic professionals have contributed in significant ways to our mission through leadership and advocacy. We ring in the new year with new ideas, new team members and collaborators. We plan on this year being big and bright for the field of sexual health and here at the Sexual Health Alliance, we hope to play a role in the sea of change we have seen gaining ground.

We invite you to join us in our plans for 2018. First, we welcome Dr. Chris Donaghue as our Director of Clinical Education for the Sexual Health Alliance. We're excited to bring more radical inclusion and education through Dr. Donaghue. 

Second, we have centralized all major positions so that we can be more consistent in our efforts. We’re also working to become more efficient with time and resources; this also means less paper. One way we plan on doing this is streamlining evaluations and CEUs to all be online. Speaking of the web, we have revamped our website to make it easier to find events - check it out: www.sexualhealthalliance.com

As part of our core mission, we will continue providing the training that most therapists and healthcare providers never received through provocative dialogue and radical collaboration - our tag line. Radical collaboration means we are all inclusive and actively welcome all practitioners, partners and friends to our Sexceptional Lectures. Anyone that talks to clients, customers or peers about sexual health is encouraged to join in on the fun. The Sexual Health Alliance currently includes the Southwest, Great Lakes and Golden Coast Regions. Want one in your area? Start a Sex Nerd Book Club, Sex Nerd Trivia or more in your area.

Take a look below at our upcoming events in California and Texas. We hope to see you at a training or lecture in the near future!


Warmly,


Heather McPherson LPC-S, LMFT-S, CST                                                                                     CEO and Founder of The Sexual Health Alliance

Sex Book Club (February 2018)

Hey Sex Book Club Nerds,

I'm the new book club leader and so happy to have the book club starting up again!

The book we have selected for February 2018 is:
Sensate Focus in Sex Therapy: The Illustrated Manual (1st Edition)
by Linda Weiner (Author),‎ Constance Avery-Clark (Author)

When:    Sunday February 18, 2018 @ 11:30am-1pm

Where:   Heather McPherson's Office, 2525 Wallingwood Drive, Building 12, Austin, TX 78746   

RSVP required by February 11, 2018 by emailing me at drjennifermcadams@gmail.com

Here's What It's About:
Sensate Focus in Sex Therapy: The Illustrated Manual is an illustrated manual that provides health professionals with specific information on the use of the structured touching opportunities used regularly by Sexologists to address their clients’ sexual difficulties (Sensate Focus 1) and enhance intimate relationships (Sensate Focus 2). This book is the only one to: vividly describe and illustrate the specific steps of, activities involved in, and positions associated with Sensate Focus; emphasize the purpose of Sensate Focus as a mindfulness-based practice; and distinguish between the purposes of Sensate Focus 1 and Sensate Focus 2. 

Through the use of artful drawings and descriptive text, this manual engages mental health and medical professionals and their clients by appealing to both the visual and the analytical. It discusses how modifications to Sensate Focus can be applied to diverse populations, such as LGBTQ clients, the elderly, the disabled, trauma survivors, and those with challenges such as Autism Spectrum, anxiety, and depression. The book also offers suggestions for dealing with common client difficulties such as avoidance, confusion, and goal directed attitudes. This comprehensive approach to Sensate Focus will remind readers of the beauty and power of touch while offering suggestions for moving from avoidance to sensory transcendence. 

Please make sure you have read and/or are familiar with the majority of the text and come prepared with a few talking points! 

I'll send a reminder email about the book club meeting in early February.  

Thank you!!

Warmly,

Jennifer McAdams, Ph.D.

Sex Nerd Trivia & Bingo Bango @ Alamo Drafthouse Mueller

Sex Nerd Trivia & Bingo Bango @ Alamo Drafthouse Mueller

Press Release:

Southwest Sexual Health Alliance's Signature "Not Yo Mama's Game Night" is now at the Alamo Drafthouse Mueller Location every 4th Wednesday bringing a ton of joy to Barrel O' Fun, the bar within. "Our goal is to bring high quality sex education that is classy, fun and entertaining - something that Austin is missing," said CEO Heather McPherson, LPC-S, LMFT-S, CST. 

"Not Yo Mama's Game Night" is organized and hosted by Emily Bridge alongside hosts Adam and Samar. See more about the next night HERE. It's always free to play and you are guaranteed to learn something too! Expand your sexual knowledge and play for the chance to win awesome prizes, furnished by Package Menswear, Forbidden Fruit, and Barrel O' Fun!

 

Not Yo Mamas Game Night Slide - November.jpg